Dear Editor,
Guyanese always have time to “gaff and laff” by viewing the spectrums of hilarity and reality in a punch line and reviewing the different shades of green with the twist and slip of the tongue. Shake the leg with an evening scroll with a stroll, may provide some fresh air, mild exercise and light entertainment.

1. Isn’t cricket a gentleman’s game off the field and on the field? Yet, the players ended up in court, but no, not to play tennis. Out goes the challenge to the GCB elections. Then again, cricket has room for off spin and (on) leg spin.
2. Grow hemp for legal cultivation not weed for illegal cultivation. A one-year jail term plus a $200K fine Bill is being tabled for offenders. There will be a duel for a dual. The Hemp Bill is meant to regularise the cultivation of hemp for industrial and consumer products.
3. Traditional farming is soil fertilisation. Now, innovative technology is paving the way to hydroponics on water and aeroponics in the air. There is nothing and everything fishy about aquaponics! Guyana has enough land, water and space for all. The inaugural Agri-Investment Forum and Expo is being hosted at the Arthur Chung Conference centre from May 19-21, 2022.
4. The GDF and GPF are protecting and securing a “One Guyana”. But 216 persons are undergoing a GDF recruitment course, while, recruitment of police trainees still stand at a halt due to the pandemic! A case of high or low risk versus no risk!
5. Changing plea from not guilty to murder but guilty to manslaughter cannot bring back the dead to life. Professor Mars must have pleaded for mercy and not murder while he was being manually strangled and sustained multiple fractures to the head and face. Will the term “throwing the books at them” be relevant?
6. The word “stamp” may be used as a verb and a noun. Senior Minister of Finance, Dr. Ashni Singh, “stamps” his feet on the stamp’s requirement for revenue on retail transactions. This is now a thing of the past due to the successful piloting of the Tax Amendment Act, Bill Number Nine of 2022.
7. Martial arts and marital arts have a lot in common but makes a difference when the letter “I” switch (not witch) places. Areas of interests reflect: the power of the mind over muscle, winning for goal instead of gold, and, realising that drive before desire. The Guyana Mixed Martial Arts Federation wants to partner with the Police to work on ways to promote the discipline of martial arts.
8. The “Golden Arrowhead” exhibits five distinguished and significant colours which exposes the brightness and richness of Guyana. The nation has been referred as the “Green” land (mud land?) and now attention is being paid for the importance of a “Blue” economy. Time to ink in another colour? Guyana and Norway support the “Blue Justice Initiative.” President, Dr. Irfaan Ali welcomed the new Norwegian envoy, Mr. Odd Magne Rudd this week.
9. Brazil invited hackers from around the world to deliberately try and hack the country’s electronic voting system in order to ensure that it is foolproof in preparation for its upcoming election. Were the Russians (Ramjattan’s) inclusive?
10. There is acclaimed “bad faith” from the big, benevolent elephant and there is assumed “bad breath” from the big, bad wolf! No number of feeble hoofs and poofs will blow the fortified, brick house away. It has been a week since the President and the Opposition Leader officially met for the first time. Dr Irfaan Ali initiated the meeting. A second round may attract and entertain boxing fans.
11. “The law is (not) an ass” is a famous legal term and some finds joy not coy in quoting. Reading between the lines is as important as reading and interpreting (not interrupting). The aftermath of the historic 2019 “No-Confidence Motion” lingers on. Will there be a final word (pardon/parting) between Mr. Jordan and Mr. Goolsaran?
12. What’s preventing ministries to run parallel in terms of being good customer service providers and synchronise with attire, time and proficiency? There is passing remarks over the efficiency of the Chief Immigration Office Department and the deficiency of the Guyana Revenue Authority Department. That “One Window” needs to be installed “like yesterday.”
13. A pastor with deeds and rapper with words, became a raper in actions. Trained and trusted as a leader in safe and sound counselling, leads to sentencing for sex due to the vulnerability of the victims who were mere children. One of the rape victims wants Captain Miller to know that, “he is a bad person and needs to stay in prison for the rest of his life, because I do not want this to ever happen to any other child.” You do not have to be an adult to utter words of wisdom.
14. If you drink, don’t drive, let a designated non-drinker drive. But if you drink and must drive, then, drink water, soda, juice, tea or coffee. The Attorney General is legislating stronger penalties for the guilty ones who drink, drive and commit traffic violations and cause accidents and deaths. Take heed and pay attention. Let common sense prevails, not nonsense.
15. Cricket, lovely cricket, no, not at Bourda. We started with cricket, let’s end with cricket, no, not rain. “War break” as captains prepare and practice for battle on the pitch. Guyana’s Harpy Eagles, (image irony or controversy) plan (promise) to hurt Barbados’s Pride. Hold your breath or wait and see?

Respectfully,
Jai Lall

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

low risk versus no risk!
5. Changing plea from not guilty to murder but guilty to manslaughter cannot bring back the dead to life. Professor Mars must have pleaded for mercy and not murder while he was being manually strangled and sustained multiple fractures to the head and face. Will the term “throwing the books at them” be relevant?

6. The word “stamp” may be used as a verb and a noun. Senior Minister of Finance, Dr. Ashni Singh, “stamps” his feet on the stamp’s requirement for revenue on retail transactions. This is now a thing of the past due to the successful piloting of the Tax Amendment Act, Bill Number Nine of 2022.

7. Martial arts and marital arts have a lot in common but makes a difference when the letter “I” switch (not witch) places. Areas of interests reflect: the power of the mind over muscle, winning for goal instead of gold, and, realising that drive before desire. The Guyana Mixed Martial Arts Federation wants to partner with the Police to work on ways to promote the discipline of martial arts.

8. The “Golden Arrowhead” exhibits five distinguished and significant colours which exposes the brightness and richness of Guyana. The nation has been referred as the “Green” land (mud land?) and now attention is being paid for the importance of a “Blue” economy. Time to ink in another colour? Guyana and Norway support the “Blue Justice Initiative.” President, Dr. Irfaan Ali welcomed the new Norwegian envoy, Mr. Odd Magne Rudd this week.

9. Brazil invited hackers from around the world to deliberately try and hack the country’s electronic voting system in order to ensure that it is foolproof in preparation for its upcoming election. Were the Russians (Ramjattan’s) inclusive?
10. There is acclaimed “bad faith” from the big, benevolent elephant and there is assumed “bad breath” from the big, bad wolf! No number of feeble hoofs and poofs will blow the fortified, brick house away. It has been a week since the President and the Opposition Leader officially met for the first time. Dr Irfaan Ali initiated the meeting. A second round may attract and entertain boxing fans.
11. “The law is (not) an ass” is a famous legal term and some finds joy not coy in quoting. Reading between the lines is as important as reading and interpreting (not interrupting). The aftermath of the historic 2019 “No-Confidence Motion” lingers on. Will there be a final word (pardon/parting) between Mr. Jordan and Mr. Goolsaran?
12. What’s preventing ministries to run parallel in terms of being good customer service providers and synchronise with attire, time and proficiency? There is passing remarks over the efficiency of the Chief Immigration Office Department and the deficiency of the Guyana Revenue Authority Department. That “One Window” needs to be installed “like yesterday.”

13. A pastor with deeds and rapper with words, became a raper in actions. Trained and trusted as a leader in safe and sound counselling, leads to sentencing for sex due to the vulnerability of the victims who were mere children. One of the rape victims wants Captain Miller to know that, “he is a bad person and needs to stay in prison for the rest of his life, because I do not want this to ever happen to any other child.” You do not have to be an adult to utter words of wisdom.

14. If you drink, don’t drive, let a designated non-drinker drive. But if you drink and must drive, then, drink water, soda, juice, tea or coffee. The Attorney General is legislating stronger penalties for the guilty ones who drink, drive and commit traffic violations and cause accidents and deaths. Take heed and pay attention. Let common sense prevails, not nonsense.
15. Cricket, lovely cricket, no, not at Bourda. We started with cricket, let’s end with cricket, no, not rain. “War break” as captains prepare and practice for battle on the pitch. Guyana’s Harpy Eagles, (image irony or controversy) plan (promise) to hurt Barbados’s Pride. Hold your breath or wait and see?

Respectfully,
Jai Lall