FELIX’S death shocked the small rural village of Tiger Lake. To die at age 23 was difficult for many to accept especially his family. He had recently returned from the backdam [gold bush] with a quantity of raw gold. He sold this and collected about half a million dollars. He also brought back with him a deadly strain of malaria. It was this disease that took his life.

Felix was one of two brothers- a twin- born to Alan and Denise Trim. Alan died when the boys were both 13. Francis continued his studies but Felix dropped out of school in Form Three. Nothing his mother said could convince him to return. He began working at the wharf and later on a chicken farm.

Meanwhile, Francis sat and passed 11 subjects at CSEC and got a scholarship to study in Cuba. He left these shores to read for a Degree in Medicine. After a number of years moving from small job to small job, Felix decided to go into the backdam. Maybe his luck would be good and he would strike it rich.

After three years in the backdam, he contracted malaria. When it got to a stage where it became dangerous to his health, he returned home to rest and rehabilitate. His mother tried to convince him to get specialist treatment in the capital city. As usual, he did not listen. One day on his way to buy his mother a new living room suite, he fell unconscious in the street and died shortly after. His body was taken to the local mortuary.

Richard had been working at the mortuary for about six years. At first, he feared and hated working with the dead but quickly got a few pleasant surprises that encouraged him to change his mind. Gold earring, rings, chains, bangles, cash and other valuable items had often been found in the pockets of corpses.

Richard made quite a few dollars from this. None was as lucrative as when he worked on young Felix. The body was delivered from the street about two in the afternoon. Richard checked the pockets found little then discovered a money belt with more money than he had ever seen in his life. Thanking his lucky stars, he stashed the belt and recorded the other items: watch, dark shades, one cap, a pair of sneakers, blue jersey and blue jeans.

When the mother and aunt of the dead youth arrived, they immediately enquired about his possessions. The recorded items were handed over, but they asked about cash. Only the $15,000 Richard had recorded was given to them. They left suspicious but in no position to argue. Richard went home early that evening and stashed the money under the floorboards of his bedroom. Not even his wife and two young daughters knew about this hiding place. He was officially $400,000 richer.

Francis returned two days before the funeral of his twin brother. He insisted that he must see the body of his brother. Early on the morning of the funeral, he went to the mortuary with his mom, aunt and cousin. The attendant was not at work as yet so the owner let them in and went out to do some business in the next village. Francis stood and stared sadly at the body of his brother. Tears flooded his eyes.

He had always loved his twin. As always he had pleaded with his stubborn sibling to return to school and to go see a doctor in the city. Neither attempt had been successful. Now he was dead. Francis wept. Mrs. Trim told him their suspicion about the attendant stealing Felix’s money. Francis was furious, he would wait and confront the thief when he came to work. As they waited, his brilliant brain hit on a perfect plan. Today he would teach the thief a lesson.

Removing the clothes from his dead twin, Francis put them on and with the help of his family hid the still cold defrosting body in a back room. Francis took up his new position on the mortuary table while his family hid outside waiting.

Richard arrived at work late that morning. He had been on a binge last night and had a nasty hangover. His boss was out which was not unusual. He went to the mortuary and began his routine clean up. There was only one corpse so not much work to be done. He swept then mopped with Fabuloso. After that, he sprinkled disinfectant then sat down at a small table to read the morning newspaper.

Out of the corner of his eyes, he saw the hands of the dead youth moved up then down to his chest. Richard stared hard at the corpse. Nothing. He blinked and then returned to his reading. He must be seeing things. This time a foot rose majestically in the air, paused for emphasis. Richard stared at this in disbelief. It then returned to the table.

He began to tremble. He knew he was not drunk. What then was happening to him? Why was he seeing such weird things? He closed the papers and looked steadily at the dead. After a long while, he began to question himself. Did he really see a hand, then a foot move? Was he being paranoid? Or, is the dead getting ready to exact its revenge on him for stealing the money? Enough nonsense! He had worked here for many years and had never before had such an experience. There must be an explanation.
He walked up to the table and glared at the corpse. Nothing happened.

“You feel I fraid dead?” he demanded.
Silence.
“Yo better lie down and behave yo self!” he ordered.
Richard turned and returned to his morning news. A sudden movement caused him to look at the corpse. Now the dead was sitting up. Worse than that, it was grinning hideously at him. He screamed in terror and fell off his chair hitting the concrete floor hard. This time the corpse did not lie down again. Richard decided to get out of there.

He, however, had one small problem, he had to pass the corpse to get to the door behind it. He decided to make a run for it. Before he had taken two steps the corpse leaped from the table and was blocking the door from inside.
“O God, please help me!” Richard sobbed.

“Weh my money yo thief!”
“M-m-money?”
“ YES!” The voice reverberated in the small room. “Last chance before yo die! Weh my money?”
Richard’s hangover became a murderous migraine and his bowels erupted in a bad way. Now the small room stank.

Francis had been enjoying himself and the power this role gave him over the helpless thief.
“Prepare to die!” The fumes were getting to Francis.
Richard saw a weird look on the face of the corpse. It was either confess or die. He chose the former.
“A sorry a thief it.”

A gleam flashed in the eyes of the “dead” man.
“A hide it under de floorboards of my bedroom. I go give it back,” he confessed.
“Never! You’ll get what you deserve!”
Richard fainted in his own mess. Francis opened the door and let the others in. They had recorded it all on their cell phones. The police arrived and took Richard and Mrs. Trim to retrieve the stolen booty. Francis, his aunt and cousin went into the backroom to return his twin to the table. What a shock awaited them.

Instead of a defrosted corpse, they discovered wet, dripping footprints leading out through the back entrance. They were horrified.
“What the hell is dis?” Francis demanded.
“He! He! He!”
The booming laugh echoed in the dark back room.
Bang! Bang! Bang!

“Let me in. A don’t want fo miss me own funeral!”
Six eyes bulged in fright. Six legs sprint for the door and three terrified voices screamed their way out of the mortuary.
I guess that funeral arrangements would be announced later.