TWO campers were hiking in the woods when one was bitten on the rear end by a rattlesnake. “I’ll go into town for a doctor,” the other said.

He ran ten miles to a small town and found the town’s only doctor delivering a baby. “I can’t leave,” the doctor said. “But here’s what to do: Take a knife, cut a little X where the bite is, suck out the poison and spit it on the ground.”

The guy ran back to his friend, who is in agony. “What did the doctor say?” the victim asked. “He said you’re gonna die,” was the plaintive reply.