Buddy Pooran was a sensible man. He never liked too much adventure. Whenever there was trouble he avoided it. He never got into a fight. He did most of his heavy drinking at home and he avoided all places known to be haunted. He had never seen a jumbie and he intended to keep it that way.Late one night Buddy was walking home. This happen while he was visiting relatives in the country. The place was black, black and he was unfamiliar with his surroundings so he kept to the sideline which led straight to the village.
Half way down the bushy dam Buddy had an urgent toilet call, one he just could not ignore. Looking around he spied a large clump of bushes close to a tree. He dived into the concealing foliage dropped his pants and getting down to business.
Imagine his horror and shock when he was rudely accosted with his pants and brief around his ankle. He was unprepared for what happened. From out of nowhere a piercing voice began to accuse him.
“A who yu!”
Buddy froze but his bowels kept going in response to his sudden rush of fear.
“A who yu!”
Buddy began to tremble what could he say to this angry person. He started to rise but froze when the voice sounded very close
“A who yu!”
“A…..a……a…” Buddy’s voice would not co-operate. He tried to stand up to see his accuser. There was no one around. Who was disturbing him at such a sensitive time? He squatted and processed to complete the business at hand.
Crack!
Someone or something was moving around. Then things went crazy. It seemed like voices were coming from everywhere shouting, demanding and even threatening.
“A who yu!”
“A who yu!”
“A who yu!”
“A who yu!”
Well this was a bit too much for this mild fella. Without a moment’s hesitation he grabbed his pants and tried to pull it up while running for his life. This did not work so well. He tripped and fell stunned.
“A who yu!”
The thing was following him. With a cry for help he took off again hindered by his pants around his knees.
“A who yu!”
In total desperation tried to pacify the entity.
“A who yu!”
“Is m…m….me!”
“A who yu!”
“Is me Buddy!”
“A who yu!”
“I yo boy Buddy!”
He got the pants up and increased his speed. When he reached the home of his relative he was exhausted and terrified. After he related his ordeal to the very concerned household everyone burst in uncontrollable laugher. This shocked Buddy and he redoubled his efforts in trying to convince them that he was telling the truth. They assured him that honesty was not the issue. Then they broke the news to him. He had not encountered a Jumbie or Spirit. He had come into contact with a night bird -Owl. This particular bird had a strange call that sound like “A who yu”
Buddy smiled in embarrassment. He wished he had known this, fifteen minutes ago. Now he had a lot of extra washing to do.
By Neil Primus