MOTHER’S Day is a global celebration honouring mothers and mother figures for their invaluable contributions and unwavering support in our lives. On this special day, mothers and mother figures are often gifted with thoughtful presents such as fresh flowers, personalised cards, delectable treats, relaxing spa days, and even the delightful experience of breakfast in bed. Children, spouses, and other family members ensure that mothers are shown gratitude and respect on this day through meaningful gestures and gifts. Unfortunately, Mother’s Day isn’t a cherished and celebratory occasion for some individuals. While the world celebrates with kind gestures and social media posts, others are deeply affected on this particular day.

For some people, the reality isn’t the traditional breakfast in bed, but rather, flowers laid by a graveside for the comforting touch of a mother they long for. There are many children in this world who are grieving on this specific day because of loss through death. A day that is marked on the calendar to celebrate a specific someone who is no longer here resurfaces feelings of grief and sadness, even when we thought we were healed from such loss.

Perhaps one of the most heartbreaking realities this Mother’s Day is a mother who is left to grieve for her child. As children celebrate their mothers with warm embraces and handcrafted gifts, there are some mothers left with only memories of their child or children. I want to particularly draw attention to Amecia Simon, the mother of Adriana Younge, who tragically lost her daughter. I want to remind grieving mothers such as Amecia that you are still a mother, even if you don’t receive hugs or kisses from your child today. This day is also meant to celebrate you. You are equally deserving of feeling special on this day.

The world we inhabit is not a perfect place. In fact, it is far from it. While Mother’s Day honours the sacrifices and journeys of motherhood, it can also reopen old wounds and complicate relationships. Regrettably, some children are or have been abused by their biological parents. Others experience abandonment or estrangement from their parents for various reasons. Additionally, some mothers are neglected by their children, particularly those who are elderly. Consequently, this day may serve as a trigger for some rather than a cause for celebration.

I did not write this to draw attention away from the celebrations of Mother’s Day. In fact, I wanted to highlight that Mother’s Day is not a fixed, idealistic celebration. It is broad, with many complexities of grief, pain, and its alignment with motherhood and celebration. With every holiday, we’re reminded of the past, both happy and sorrowful memories. As you celebrate Mother’s Day today, I hope you take a moment to check in with those around you who’ve lost a mother or a child to death or any other form of loss. A quick message of acknowledgement or a phone call of gratitude might go a long way in making someone’s day a little better today.

Today, if you are grieving and in pain, I hope you remember that your grief is valid and acknowledged. You should not feel guilty for feeling sadness on a day meant for celebration.

A Happy Mother’s Day to you all. In the words of Terri Guillemets,
“Those we love and lose are always connected by heartstrings into infinity.”