READING about grief and experiencing it at a maximum value are two different experiences. I’ve realised that grief was familiar because I’ve felt that feeling many times in the past. From failed friendships to not receiving a grade I wanted—I’ve experienced grief in some way or another before. I lost my grandmother two years ago.

That experience completely changed my outlook on grief and the stages that come with it. That experience was magnified, and looking back, I can visibly see the stages I’ve endured. Today, I am happy to say that I’ve finally accepted the reality of her death. She is no longer here, and I am progressing through life with that in mind. Two years ago, that reality was completely different for me.

I wanted to share this personal journey to highlight the importance of growth through grief. It is possible to be okay again after a loss. It may seem impossible at first, but I want you to understand that grief is a natural response to loss, just as how happiness or joy are natural responses to great gain. In my University studies, I learned about the five stages of grief that were posited by Elizabeth Kubler- Ross. She highlighted denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance as those stages.

While she listed them in this order, it does not necessarily mean that we may all experience them in this order. In fact, some people experience some stages together, and some may not experience specific stages altogether. These stages may sound dreadful to experience, but many people are able to overcome them within 2 years of their loss.
We’re all unique and different; the same can be said about how or what we grieve for. Grief is not only limited to death.

We can grieve for divorces, the end of friendships, the loss of personal items in a fire, and the loss of a job—among many other losses. I want you to remember that grief is natural and it happens to all of us. It is our natural reaction to loss; with the right amount of support, self-care and resilience, we can overcome it. Grief is stuck with us over time, but we can find ways to be whole again, and it is possible to continue with our daily lives. One day, you’ll look back at the stages you’ve endured and finally accept the fact that this is your new reality. With that in mind, you can also reminisce on the experience and use it as a recipe for growth and resilience.