Children should not be burdened with adult responsibilities

LIKE many creatives my age, some of my work is inspired by the modern world around me. The world is inclusive of social media. I recently came across a Facebook post that read, “Kids are not responsible for 1. Caring for siblings 2. Being emotional support for adults 3. Finding money to pay bills 4. Creating rules, structure, and order because the adults can’t or won’t 5. Taking care of their parents’ emotionally 6. Managing fights between parents 7. Protecting themselves from adults 8. Figuring things out on their own” If there wasn’t a time when I was happy to be on social media, the moment I found that post served as one.

Quite frankly, many children are forced to grow up before they’re even adults. Many children are forced to play the role of “parents” for themselves. My childhood may be filled with dolls and playtime, but there are probably hundreds who can’t say the same. The innocence that childhood brings is ripped away by those closest to some children. As an adult, at times certain life events can be quite troubling for me. I often reminisce about my peaceful childhood for comfort. I think back to a time when life was simpler. If we strip children of that simplistic component that childhood brings, we are asking them to always remember life through its complexities.

I’ve had my fair share of being asked to “grow up” as a child. I was always academically inclined to excel and my parents and teachers encouraged me to keep pushing forward. While my example of “growing up” too early might not be generally perceived as a negative one, it did have negative effects on me. I’m sure the adults in my life thought what they were doing was best for me at the time. To be honest, sometimes I simply needed some time to relax and play instead of studying. It worked out for me and my example but sadly enough, this is not the case for many others. There are other drastic and horrifying instances of children being forced to take on more than what their little minds and hearts can bear.

I haven’t figured out life and haven’t cracked open many codes at the age of 20. Even as a writer, social work student and entrepreneur I haven’t fully figured out much of life’s secrets and what it takes to be an adult. Sometimes I can even hear my 50-year-old father mumbling the same words. Can we then imagine what it’s like to be fully forced into ‘adulthood’ as a child? I’ve seen older siblings being asked to step in as babysitters. I’ve seen children having to dismiss their own emotions to cuddle that of their parents.’ I’ve seen children being neglected to face the scary world on their own. I’ve seen children being forced to be mediators between parents and their battles. I’ve also seen ‘hurt children’ grow up to be ‘hurt adults.’

Yes, parents and guardians aren’t perfect. They’re humans after all, but the least we can do is allow children to be children. It is important to foster and encourage good mental health and emotional well-being from an early age. We need to acknowledge that these very children will grow up one day to become adults of the future. Children should not be used to fill voids. Children should not be used as tools to live a life their parents missed out on. The brief season of childhood is a time to strengthen our children. That post on Facebook was an enlightenment to myself and the way I’ve viewed parenting styles/skills. I hope these words can do the same for you as well.

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