MIAMI, United States – We’re not joking and we’re not going to say anything tacky about Italian cruise ships either, but this is still a scream. “The Barge to Hell,” a cruise billing itself as “The World’s Most Extreme Metal Cruise,” is set to rock out of Miami this December on Royal Caribbean International’s 2,744-passenger Majesty of the Seas.
The four-night, heavy metal music festival will feature 40 metal bands playing live shows for over 2,000 “headbangers from around the world.”
“Barge to Hell” has proudly announced 23 of the divinely dreadfully-named featured bands so far, including Napalm Death, Behemoth, Enslaved, and Sepultura.
The organizers of this devil of a do say there will be no set meal times onboard, and no assigned seating in the ship’s theatre, where seats will be removed, “because at a Metal show, who actually wants assigned seating in front of the stage?”  Who indeed?
Cruise activities will include meet and greet sessions with the artists, “Metal Karaoke” and a belly-flop contest, the latter hopefully in the pool. Passengers are hell-bent on rocking the boat.
“Barge to Hell” sets sail Monday December 3, 2012, from Miami, will spend two days at sea and one at Nassau, Bahamas, before returning to Miami on December 7.
It is expected that tickets for the metalmanic bash will soon be as hard to come by as sno-cones in hell.
We can’t wait.