Direct Answers

Kiss and tell
I AM 18, and I was in a relationship with my ex-boyfriend for a year. We consummated our relationship by sleeping together. We had a real connection, and I was the only one he could simply sit down and talk to.
Lately we fought. After that, it was a cycle. Arguing and fighting, talking and resolving, then right back to arguing. It was horrible. Every day I found myself feeling more depressed and alone.  
Finally, I broke it off. I ignored him for a month, which was not easy. Then I met the new guy at work. He is 21, and treated me like a queen from the start. We have been involved for three months. I’m not saying we’re going to run off and get married. I’m 18, for crying out loud! But we do have a solid connection.
I slept with the new guy. I finally got the guts to tell my ‘ex’ about us and what we had done. It was hard for me because I know how much he still cared about me. After my ‘ex’ found out, he used every curse word in the dictionary, saying how much he hates me, and how big a slut I am.
So please, tell me: Did I do something wrong?

Barb

Barb,
Are you as naive and innocent as you pretend? If another girl told you she had sex with your ‘ex’, mightn’t the first word out of your mouth be, “Slut!” And what would her motivation be for telling you? Obviously: To hurt you!
Why did you tell your ‘ex’? Obviously: To hurt him! Someone else is having me: That’s what you said. If you were trying to make him jealous and angry, you succeeded.
Gentlemen never tell is an old expression. It’s a maxim you could learn from.

Wayne & Tamara

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