Hello to all my loyal readers.
RECENTLY, I ran into an old high school friend who has turned out to be quite successful. However, when I asked him (persistently!) what he does now, he repeatedly responded “Oh, I don’t do anything.” Very humble that one. It got me thinking about life in general and whether we are all living up to our full potential and if we aren’t, how can we? So, this is dedicated to the boy who does nothing.

Let’s start simple: what is our individual potential? These are our latent qualities or abilities that can be developed for future success. How can we maximise this? The first step is always self–reflection and awareness, which includes both our strengths and weaknesses. What are our natural talents, what needs more practice, what should we just stay away from completely?

When we figure out our current capabilities, it is typical to simultaneously establish passion. If it is recognised that you are not so good at what you are passionate about, not to worry- humans can learn pretty much anything with motivation and persistence.

So, you have found something you want to pursue, what next?
Set a goal. Now goals are actually rarely achieved – kind of like New Year Resolutions – but this is typically because of one simple reason. They are too broad or vague, which makes them seem overwhelming and unachievable. For example, the most common goal I hear is to “save money.”

Let’s play out a scenario. What if I asked you as a goal, to save 1 million dollars by the end of this year and ask you to rate how likely that would be on a scale of 1-10, most of you would average between 0-3. However, if I suggested that you put away a small, specific amount every month, cut certain frivolous spending and even suggest a specific way to bring in more income, how much higher would that number be now? Specificity is key when it comes to achieving goals.

Now, we have a specific goal, it’s time to acknowledge that achieving this goal is a by-product of what we are doing. How much time are we putting into achieving it? Is the time productive? Length of time does not necessarily amount to good productivity.

As a psychologist, I have to think that a key aspect is mindset, which is a personal set of beliefs that shape how you make sense of yourself and the world in general. We, psychologists, believe that there are two types of mindsets; fixed and growth. A fixed mindset, just as it sounds, is concrete, unwavering beliefs about yourself. For example, if a person with a fixed mindset believes they are not good at something or may not enjoy a certain experience, this belief will not change. If they did badly at math as a child, they will believe this throughout their life, without even trying again to see if their understanding or capabilities have changed. If they did not enjoy the experience, as was predetermined, it will be reinforced that they should not try anything they think they may not like – even without any evidence for this belief. This type of mindset understandably reinforces negative thoughts, emotions, and behaviours, making it harder to reach your full potential.

Now a growth mindset is exactly the opposite, it’s a more positive, realistic and rational way of viewing yourself and the world. There is the belief that things can be achieved with the right amount of resources and effort, as well as an understanding that you cannot predict the future and how certain situations will make you feel.

Let’s use a quick and simple example of something that I know causes many a great deal of anxiety- public speaking. Let’s say two people have a fear of public speaking due to a once embarrassing situation during childhood and one individual has a fixed mindset and the other a growth one. Now, it’s time for them to speak publicly again and it doesn’t go as well as they would have hoped. The person with a fixed mindset will believe “I knew I was never any good at public speaking- I should try to avoid this at all costs.” The individual will the growth mindset will instead examine what went wrong and come up with solutions to make it better next time. With a growth mindset, there is no such thing as failure, there are only hurdles towards your success.

So, for the sake of self-awareness, what kind of mindset do you have?

The Bannister Effect is also something I always thought to be quite interesting. It reinforces that sometimes psychological barriers play into the equation of success and failure. For many years, it was considered a law of nature that the human body was incapable of running a mile in less than four minutes. That was until May 6, 1954, when Roger Bannister ran a mile in three minutes 59.4 seconds. He did what was long considered impossible, but it turned out that it was only impossible because people believed it was impossible.

A few little but important tips:
When it comes to succeeding in the area you want, do not let popular opinion dissuade you. I think many of our fears and self-defeating thoughts come from the fear of what others may think. Many people don’t pursue what they want to do based on embarrassment as they feel it may not live up to some sort of standard. But really, who creates these standards? What society feels about your passion and pursuit of it is not your concern. Almost by definition, living up to your full potential requires you to step outside your comfort zone and expand your boundaries.

Keep your eyes on the progress, not the prize. While it is true that it is important to understand your end goal, it is your progress that will determine if you are going to get it. Focus more on the little, everyday steps you are taking.

Never compare yourself to others. Everyone has their own timeline, and it is based on so many factors. Comparing yourself to others is the fastest way to be unhappy and feel unsuccessful.
Finally, accept that things may not go your way and you may temporarily fail. During these times, remind yourself that there is no overnight success. More importantly, while failures in a career, hobby or even personal life can be heartbreaking, it’s just that; it is not a reflection on you as a person. Take it as a learning opportunity and maintain the growth mindset for improvement.

I genuinely do believe that every single human being has great potential within them, waiting to be unleashed.
Thanks for reading. Please send any topics you’d like to discuss to caitlinvieira@gmail.com. Also, if you are interested in personal counselling sessions, please contact me on +592 623 0433