“Is how come dese ’oman-drawers get pon my jackass eh?”You see what I telling you? Somebody mustbe sprinkle guinea-pepper pon this camp-ground…is another tekups cranking up. Watch –
Is Sweetbeak – he picking up some panty from his jackass and he pelting them cross the camp. D prostitute that they calling Steeldonkey…stand up quiet, quiet, at a corner table weighing her gold on a lill scale? she ain getting in no tekups; but you see since Sweetbeak say so? Steeldonkey jump – like if somebody jook her – and she start rush-up to tek-on Sweetbeak. Then she remember her gold…she tun-back quick, quick.
This time, Steeldonkey tekking her time. She trow d gold back in d inhaler kiddy. She cover it and she shove it in her bosom cool-cool-like. Everybody in d camp could tell that is rev Steeldonkey revving-up so. But Sweetbeak getting on like he ain digging she; and is what he saying now?
“Steeeuuuwwpps! Is where else you going go in dis bush to find more ‘oman-drawers in pork-knocker-camp than in-a-dis-ya camp right here eh? When done alyuh wondering is why d goal a-hide he face? Gold must hide he face when it got ‘oman-drawers all over pork-knocker place! WO-MAN PANTY AND DRY CO-CO-NUT AIN GOT NO RIGHT IN PORK-KNOCK-A CAMP!”
Sweetbeak bawling to the top of he voice and he wouldn’t stop…he just won’t stop…he going on and on like aunty-man rain –
“I sorry bad, but ah gotta say it…I is a ole-time pork-knocka miner-man…I talking from experience – who vex dem-vex, who please dem-please – ting lika dis does be heavy cross… MORA-CROSS! – pon camp-ground – and dat mean BLOWS! God knows!
And pon topa that, Sweetbeak demonstrating; he lifting up a panty pon d edge of he cutlass, he waving and displaying it for d whole camp to see.
Eh-eh, watch story! Doan tell me somebody didn’t sprinkle guinea pepper….
Anyhow, just then is when Steeldonkey finish weighing her gold and stokesing it away safe in her bosom…is now she ready fuh Sweetbeak. Steeldonkey stand-up sideways with she hands pon her hips and she head hanging pon one-side watching Sweetbeak up and down so. She screw-up she face…she stretch-out her tongue…licking her lips like if she already tasting d busing she preparing to put pon Sweetbeak; now that she good and ready fuh he, Steeldonkey calling out:
“Haaaye Sweetbeak, Sweetbeak! “
Steeldonkey calling he, but Sweetbeak playing he not hearing.
“Haaye, haaye, haaaaye SWEETBEAK! is YOU ah talking to, doan play like you ain hearing…is you I talking to, okay?…time come fuh you stop pomping scene…stop showing-off your damn self just cause you got a audience. I want you tell me someting Sweetbeak – no, first…answer me dis –
“Sweetbeak, talk d truth – is how come you get that name eh? I sure you did had to deal with ‘oman drawers to get that name? But forget it – doan worry with that – leh we stay pon dis part. A day when you ready?…must ask mih to tell you your own story… I get your files…ah know yuh story; how you was a mora-cross she had to bear since your father deposit you in your mother belly…know what ah mean? When your daddy done get he fun? he just flick he ting and walk away from she and you? Is your own, own story I showing you – yuh-sight, Sweetbeak?
“But no…you doan know…right? You poor ting. I just feel sorry for you. You doan even know you is yuh own MORA-CROSS right? But I know, and ah telling yuh straight…cause I overstand that d reason you living pon my bones ev-ry day, ev-ry day? is cause your mother was saying that you is a cross since she first discover you tek up residence in she belly and she know she ain got nothing to look forward to from your father to help her mine you. And she just won’t stop cussing your daddy…D FIRST MORA-CROSS….You doan even understand right? You don’t know what d hell I talking bout right?.
“You doan even remember you did hearing your mother cussing your daddy since when you been in she belly; but Sweetbeak? trust me, you did hearing what your mother saying bout your daddy while you was still in her belly. You mustbe doan even know is so you turn a psycho; but tek it from me – any sensible woman who ever breed will tell you that she chile does start hearing and understanding from right there in her belly. God only know why we women doan use we power and start-talk to we unborn children while they ain got no choice but to listen and hear….is only so we could make sure we doan bring boy-chile like you in d world – dem who hate women. When we cuss we unborn pickney daddy? if d baby is a boy-chile? he does think is he we talking bout.
“Anyway Sweetbeak…you listen good, hear this – You hate me cause you hate your mother, cause when you come out her belly it didn’t stop – she cussing your father, ah mean – it didn’t stop. Was a word and a blow, not so, Sweetbeak? So you blame her fuh that. But she is your mother and you was a baby; is she who got to mine you …put food in your mouth…wash yuh diaper and clean your mess; you couldn’t take it out pon her. IsTHAT is why me and my drawers ketching hell from you now, Sweetbeak, is only cause I name woman – it ain got nothing to do with pork-knocker blows.”
Steel-donkey make to turn away…then she tun back sudden –
“And what about yuh wife Sweetbeak, you got a wife, right Sweetbeak? I sure you does give she hell for all you did get fuh yuh father from your mother. One a these days you must come ask me…ah will show yuh son. Doan be ashame. I will show you just how you happen”.
Son? You hear that? Steeldonkey calling Sweetbeak “son”?…is that big-big man that young-young girl calling “son”; then she just turn she back and walk away….if you see how she swinging her hips and rolling she bum-bum in Sweetbeak face.
Steeldonkey is one a them women who could roll d bumbalum with ease and full expression when they vex and they want to give you a piece a they mind – sometimes they doan even have to say a word. These women could finish you off by just turning round and walking away and is rudeness fuh-so in your face. You could be boss-man or boss-woman, husband, lover, father or mother….talking about full-body women with nuff behind like that Buxton-gal in this old story.
She is d one the village choose to represent them in a beauty contest in d city, Georgetown. They couldn’t wait for her to come back with news about d contest. Buxton-gal had a simple answer for all d nuff-nuff questions d villagers asking; she say –
“With the face, I didn’t place. But with the bubby and ass? – I tear they rass!”
Sweetbeak vex baaad, cause d men in d camp now whooping and hollering loud-loud. And all poor Sweetbeak manage to say when Steeldonkey done with he, is –
“Woman!”
But Steeldonkey ain vlumps pon he no more. She didn’t even look round. She just turn her back and flounce away.
D fire flying and sounding like a gun, cause Putagee shoving more and more of d congo-pump firewood in d cumbus fireside and complaining that how is not he turn to cook, but is only cause he worms throwing cuffam he decide to take over d work. Is so putagee cooking and he cussing and d fire sparks in d cumbus going crack- crack-crack and flying; is nuff nuff confusion and sensational itation….like somebody sprinkle guinea pepper pon d camp ground; then –
Eh-eh! Listen, hear – is another tekups starting up over there….
To Be Continued.