YOU KNOW, I’ve just gone through yet another bad experience with a man. In my pain, I looked online, probably because I’m in a strange city three years now and still only know the people at work. I’ve let my insecurities and low self-esteem get to me, and can’t deal with living in such a plastic place.
But the job keeps me here… alone; another issue I will have to face because my happiness has cost me dearly. Or has it? Maybe I need to make the best of where I am, because I was once told: ‘No matter where you go, there you are.’
Now, looking back, my journeys have taken me to so many different places, and the truth is I’ve been running from me and all the horrible things I feel I am deep down. It’s a struggle I battle every day, constantly turning to the same type of man again and again, because I believe them when they say they love me.
I so desperately want to be loved, yet I always find they’re players and not truthful. But they are just so perfect for the first few months. Then the truth unveils itself, and I’m back to square one.
You’d think I’d have learnt at 32 years of age and so many failed attempts. Regardless, I came across your column. I love how you utilize quotes from stories, myths and books you’ve read along the way.
I have to say, in all the times I’ve reached out for love (and I’ve been doing it over the computer for it all to blow up in my face), this is the first time I found it. Why? Because there are no lies behind your words, but truth. And the truth always sets you free.
No matter how painful it can be to face, it’s not nearly as painful as not acknowledging it.