WHEN a marble is tossed upon the floor, it will seek equilibrium by rolling to the lowest point in the room. There, it will remain unless otherwise disturbed. Without any complicated forces in play, it will simply attain the position that is most natural for it.
Human beings are also naturally directed towards roles and duties that are destined for them from the moment they are born. As soon as they have developed the knowledge and skill to do so, they will adopt these roles and play them well. Society, in its essence, can be described as a well-oiled machine whose function depends on the competence of its individual parts.
In a modern world, however, ‘society’ comprises around 8 billion people, interlinked through a complex web of culture and technology. In this case, society cannot be reduced to a machine. In fact, our very attempt to do so may lead to its complete breakdown.
Our understanding of human lives and the destiny that lies at the end of each one of our paths is grossly limited. Even those who live with us or grow with us are very often unable to help us understand who we are meant to be. Yet, despite this limited understanding, we are quite prone to placing unfair expectations on younger generations under the guise of directing them towards who they are meant to become. In reality, the final destination of someone’s life is something they are meant to discover by themselves, not by the forceful direction of mentors or peers.
After all, even the inert marble, upon being tossed onto the ground, seeks its own destination. So why should human beings not do the same?
For centuries, people have lived by adopting predetermined roles and conforming to the expectations set by those around them. Oftentimes, they do this because it is the most comfortable way to live, even though it is not the most fulfilling one. For many people, drawing outside the lines would mean disturbing the status quo and risking, at the very least, the loss of social standing or peace. At the same time, we also cannot say that the existence of rules and order precludes freedom. The very ability to voice one’s opinion and discuss alternative ways of thinking is a consequence of the order that comes when we respect one another and adhere to the general rules and etiquette of society.
So, becoming the best version of ourselves has transformed into a sort of balancing act. To be ideal members of society, we must follow the norms and rules established to promote peace and liberty, while at the same time challenging unfair limits and boundaries. Strangely enough, even as we endure and struggle through this journey, we must also carry another responsibility to ensure that society functions well: we must live and let live.
As we interact with others throughout our lives, we will be introduced to many ideologies and ways of living that may come into direct conflict with our own. We may not understand some of the choices people make, especially when a loved one is making them. Although our first instinct may be to stop these people and change the way they live, doing so may not always be the right course of action.
We cannot truly know the best way for another person to live. Hence, as an alternative, we can only seek the best way to discover the path that leads us to our own destinations. This, of course, can look different for different people.
We have been conditioned to believe that ideologies should only be held in terms of extremes—as sides. However, there is a very real space between the two sides that many people choose to inhabit. Without expanding our worldviews, we may find ourselves struggling to accept this fact and, consequently, failing to live a fulfilling life in the futile pursuit of changing others.
The true beauty of life lies between the spaces, between the sides, and in the choices that we may not understand but still accept with love.
