WHEN a flower falls upon the surface of a stream, its movements are captured by the current, and the direction of its flow decides the remainder of its journey. Although the flower’s buoyancy may mimic a sense of detachment from the world, it is actually placed quite securely under control. For the entire time that it remains on the surface of the stream, it cannot move or stop at any point unless the current determines that it should. As such, the flower is caught in an unfortunate confinement that strangely imitates freedom while, at the same time, taking away one’s sense of control.

As we progress through life, we may realise that human beings are not very different from a lone flower floating down a stream. We try our very best to take control of our lives, and yet we may find ourselves in situations where there is simply nothing we can do to achieve the outcome we desire. At times, we can feel detached from the rest of the world. At other times, we can feel pressured to go along with its forces. Ultimately, we feel like we are not in control.

Eventually, with growth, comes the ability to manage these emotions and gain a sense of acceptance. Yet we do not realise that the unpredictability of life is not just reserved for our experiences; it also extends to the relationships we develop. Like a stream splitting into two or drifting into a stagnant pond, many relationships may change their dynamics over time. Friends may grow apart, and family members may move to different corners of the world. Even healthy relationships may come to a sudden halt due to the changes life brings.

There is no antidote to unpredictability, and certainly no shield to protect ourselves from its hurtful consequences. To live a life full of meaningful experiences, we must be willing to risk the pain of loss or change, especially when it comes to connecting with others. In our generation, we seem to have discovered a way to enjoy the benefits of human connection without having to accept the downsides. This loophole, of course, takes the form of technology.

To protect ourselves, we often have a natural tendency to deprive ourselves of the necessary parts of being human—we mistake loneliness for solitude and comfort for peace. With today’s technological developments, this tendency becomes much easier to lean on. By simply watching a show on television, we can find ourselves in the company of several interesting characters who may become our friends during the time we spend watching them on a screen. In fact, it has even been discovered that some people may begin to develop the same level of emotional connection with fictional characters as they do with real-life friends.

As we continually turn away from connection for fear of rejection, change or loss, we choose to give up valuable time that we could use to discover the beauty of the world around us. As important as solitude is in helping us understand ourselves, it is easy to let it turn into loneliness. Similarly, as crucial as technology is in various endeavours, it can quickly turn into a replacement for human connection when its use is unregulated. For instance, today one can spend time chatting with robots rather than with human beings.

Life can indeed be controlling and, at the very same time, difficult to control. Despite this, there is a magnificence in the spirit that refuses to see the chaos of life as an oppressive force, but rather sees it as an invitation to find thrill and joy. A flower may decay and disintegrate under the forceful current of a stream, but seeds will use the current to travel as far as they can to take root.

So, whenever you are afraid to form a connection and are instead about to turn to technology, remind yourself that rejection is as beautiful as acceptance, and that loss is as beautiful as love, because in each one of these experiences, you will find yourself in extraordinary ways.