THE ESCALATION of juvenile delinquency and juvenile crimes worldwide is indicative of the breakdown of the family structure as a societal norm, with absconding fathers and single mothers having become the new norm.The second Sunday in June is set aside in the world’s annual calendar to honour fathers; but how many fathers honour their responsibilities? The biological feat of impregnating a woman is, generally, a simple and probable enjoyable activity; but the responsibilities that come with fatherhood have many men running for cover, that is after the boasting, machismo chest-beating and celebrations are over.

Being a good father is not an easy proposition; and unless a man is fully committed, he should not even think of fathering children, because a father’s duties are first and foremost, and are time-consuming and all-consuming.

Good parent need to be there for their children; not just for milestones – which of course is important, but also for the daily events, such as study, play, guidance, companionship, friendship, because the first shaper of a child’s personality is a parent.

Discipline is necessary, but first it is more important to be a good role model; not the “Do as I say and not as I do” variety.

Although it is necessary to try to understand your child’s point of view and give his or her opinions a hearing and genuine consideration, a parent has to make the final decision on what the child needs and what is the best course, because at the end of the day, a parent is the absolute guardian of the child’s interests and welfare, and mostly (should be) to guide the child in the right direction so that his/her pursuits are elevating to the rounded personality that should befit a good and productive human being.

A father needs to schedule his commitments so that they interfere as little as possible with quality time he should spend with his offspring; and each child should get its equal share of his attention; because sibling rivalry is painful, destructive and starts with competition for a parent’s love and attention.

And while fathers are not super-humans and do get tired, then it is okay to sit in front of a television and watch a movie or a game together. Even girls like to relate to bonding with dad over a game.

And sharing even one meal a day is a prerequisite for bonding with the entire family; not hiding behind a newspaper or book, but sharing experiences, relating to each other in the multiplicity of ways that families do over a meal. This builds trust and relationships and, most importantly memories that last a lifetime.

Build your child’s character by teaching him responsibilities, by not shirking yours, delegating household tasks to everyone and ensuring all of you play your part. Daily tasks instill discipline and a sense of time and gives a child a sense of comfortability.

While discipline is important, punishment should not exceed the crime. Discuss with your children your expectations, and what should be the parameters for behavioural patterns; and let them know boundaries in no uncertain manner.

If you invest time, care and love into your children, the rewards are limitless – not least in love and respect, and in the knowledge that you helped shape a good human being. Because, ultimately, a good father is the shaper of his child’s character and destiny.