This is a question that lingered in her mind each day since he kissed her ‘goodbye’. She couldn’t cry that day, the feeling in her heart tied in knots as she watched him walk away. “Why is this happening to me, again?” was her silent question.

He had come into her life like a storm wave, capsizing the calmness in her mind she had battled so hard the last four years to find. The turbulent waters had tossed her into his arms for she was working at his home, seeing him every day, having to talk to him, his interest in her that spoke more than words could.
She had left when her aunt returned to her job and she began her studies, hoping that short encounter with him could be the end but he continued to see her, wanting to take her to lunches and dinners or just spending private time some place quiet.
The fact that she was four years older than him, from a lower middle class family and had already shared her life with someone else, didn’t matter to him.
“None of that matters to me,” he told her, “I see a beautiful girl I like, in whose eyes there is pain and sadness.”
“Why would you want to share my unhappy life?” she had asked him, “When you can have the world in your hands.”
He hadn’t answered, passing his finger over her lips, a deep look in his eyes, passion unclothing itself and when he spoke, his voice was just a whisper against her cheek, “I want to see your smile, to relight the passion in your eyes.”
For someone so young, he understood the language of love, just the way it had been for her at sixteen, walking along paths of a perfumed garden, the signature of love, igniting a wildfire of passion and bliss.
From the depths of heartache, her soul had become reborn, but a nagging little fear that it would not last stayed with her for all the days and nights of their love life – secret lovers – he had wanted it to be so his family could not intrude to separate them.
But the separation happened when Arun’s father decided to send him overseas to study. The young man he was, he could not go against his father’s wishes so he consented to continue the legacy of the family business.
It had stunned her but it was not as devastating as the first time for she had not believed, heart and soul, it would last. Saying ‘Goodbye’ again was so hard and wiping the tears from her eyes, he had said, “I will come back to you, Sonia, I…”
She had put a finger to his lips, silencing him, “Don’t make a promise you may not be able to fulfill.”
“I want you to believe I will.”
Once again, love had walked away from her life but he did not close the door behind, his phone calls and texting keeping it open. She did not often answer his calls or reply to his messages, her heart not truly believing he would return, focusing on her studies and to graduate top of her class with a diploma in cosmetology. She had felt such a deep sense of elation in achieving her goal, her spirits free to fly high in the sky.
“Now I can design my life,” she had said, “To become my own woman.”
She had returned home and opened her own beauty salon, her work becoming her life, a success story that impressed those who had known of her broken marriage. Her business grew as she became recognised as an expert makeup artist and she embraced work, leaving little room for anyone in her thoughts. But she just couldn’t stop thinking of Arun, for all the time they had spent together and the two years he had been gone.
On Valentine’s day for each year, he had sent a bouquet of red roses for her and in her mind, the question of the century lingered: “Would he come back for me?”
Sonia slept a little late, snuggled in the soft, fragranced comfort of her bed, for it was Sunday, the only day she got some rest, when there were no wedding appointments. Her mother looked at her a bit expectant as she sat down for a late breakfast.
“So, anything new?” She asked.
Sonia looked at her with a patient little smile, “Nothing mom.”
She knew that expectant look, she knew how much her mother wished she could find someone new in her life so she could be that happy, free spirited girl, again.
But the hurt and the loss were like stones in Sonia’s heart, the colour of grey.
What would it take to turn those stones into precious gems to put glitz in her life?
“Don’t worry mom,” she assured her mother, “I’m doing fine.”
Her mother sighed and said nothing more on the topic, talking instead about other issues in society. But her motherly heart worried about her daughter’s loneliness and she hoped and prayed something good could happen for her.
Sonia was sitting on the porch in the afternoon, browsing through a fashion magazine when her cellphone rang. It was an old friend she hadn’t heard from in a while.
“You wouldn’t believe who’s back,” she told Sonia after talking for a little while.
“Who is it?”
“It’s Ryan, your ex-husband.”
“Oh,” Sonia exclaimed, feeling a little stab of pain on hearing his name after six years, so deeply, he had hurt her.
“He was asking for you,” her friend told her.
“He shouldn’t.” Sonia said, anger rising in her heart, “I have nothing to say to him.”
She laid in bed sleepless that night, wondering why he would ask for her, after all this time, not one phone call, no care or concern for her, knowing she had been so young and had given up everything for him. Her friend had told her he was married so there was nothing left between them, all gone, only the memories of the two years they had spent together. Those memories had become blurred when she met Arun and now, the time spent with him was what stayed fresh in her mind.
The next morning she opened her beauty salon, putting her mind on work and business for the day. She felt proud to know that after her break-up she hadn’t grovel in the dust of self- pity but risen instead to face the challenges of life. Today she was standing strong through her hard work and merit recognized in the world of beauty and fashion.
As the day progressed, several of Sonia’s customers who knew of her past relationship with Ryan mentioned that he was back, how tall he had gotten and how more handsome. She listened, not responding much, her emotions displaying no interest, except for the tamed anger she was feeling within.
When he had told her things have changed, to move on with her life, she hadn’t quite understood then but now she did for he had found someone else, forgetting the love they had shared.
That night as she laid in bed, she wondered, “If deep love is so easy to forget, would Arun forget too?”
He had wanted her to believe that he would return but she was too scared to embrace that thought for the past still haunted her. The text messages sent to her phone, now, awoke a fear in her that it was Arun, telling her ‘It’s over’. Valentine’s day drew closer and she hadn’t heard from Arun in a couple of weeks, her short message to him, unanswered.
“How many more lonely nights?” she asked, standing on the porch, looking at the stars in the sky.
Her first love was lost somewhere in the marsh lands of no return as she waited for another.
On Valentine’s day the rush for makeovers and hairstyles were so overwhelming, she and her two assistants worked nonstop until late in the afternoon. She was alone, packing a few beauty products, when a voice she knew so well said,
“Do you always work this late?”
Sonia’s hand froze in what she was doing and turning slowly, she saw him standing by the half closed doors with a bunch of red roses in his hand.
“Happy Valentine’s day, Sonia.”
Tears misted her eyes and she laughed, a sensation of happiness rushing through her body.
“Arun.”
He had changed so much, taller with chiseled good looks, his muscled body, toned and perfected, such a man.
“Don’t I get a hug?” he asked, smiling at her awed and happy expression.
He opened his arms and she ran to him, not tossed by the waves now but by herself and hugged him, crying, for all the days and night she had waited to feel the comfort of his embrace and invigorating masculine scent. He held her close and against her hair, he said in a low tone, “I told you I was coming back for you, why didn’t you believe me?”
“I was too scared,” she said, her lips trembling.
He wiped the tears from her face, “How can I forget when your fragrance is still with me, your passion and love.”
She looked at him, holding the red roses close to her heart, the love in his eyes, changing the stones of hurt and loss into precious gems. Broken now, were the wings of loneliness for he had kept his promise and she whispered, her heart and soul, unburdened from fear,
“Arun, I love you.”
A Valentine’s night to celebrate their love, unforgettable memories.

(By Maureen Rampertab)