ALL families need time together, but finding a time and place to connect can be difficult. In today’s busy culture, families are pulled in many different directions. To combat this, parents must intentionally create a structure that allows the family to have meals together. This requires planning, as someone needs to buy groceries, cook the meal, gather the family and clean up. Parents can ensure these tasks are completed by establishing roles and responsibilities for each family member. In Fellowship at the Family Table, Geary Reid discusses how to do this.

Once the family is gathered, the dinner table should be a place of formality and safety where family members feel listened to and respected. During mealtimes, family members can facilitate discussion, teach social skills to younger children or siblings, and emphasise the importance of nutrition. Families can share important news or discuss decisions together. Every family needs time to connect, and the dinner table is the perfect place to do so.

1. Gathering the family

With a large family, several people may have their own rooms. To participate at the family table, however, the family must be gathered together.

1.1 Set a time for the family to feast

Each family member may sleep and wake at different times. However, if the family is going to be strengthened and feast at the same table, then they must all be ready at the same time. When families eat together, it encourages them to grow together, and the family can become stronger.

There may be complaints from some family members who would like to sleep longer hours. People who spend too much time sleeping may miss many important opportunities. Sleep is essential, but there is no additional benefit to longer sleep duration, especially when there are important things to be done. Hopefully, persons will manage their sleeping hours, which may require going to bed early and waking early.

Sometimes it takes one family member to be the main person to gather the others, but it is important to establish a time for family members to awake. This will help them stay committed and remove the burden of having to wake the others. Those who love to sleep late in the morning often feel offended when they have to wake up early. Nevertheless, it is important to have the family together to participate in breakfast. Waking up early should not be limited to breakfast; it should become a lifestyle for people to embrace. Those who are accustomed to waking early will have few challenges in doing so to attend work, especially if they are working for an employer.

During the week, people may wake up at a different time than on the weekend. Some people, especially those who work Monday to Friday, often look forward to the weekend because it offers them the opportunity to get some additional rest.

Those employed on a shift system may not always be able to wake up at a specific time with the family, as they may be returning home when others are leaving. However, there must be an understanding within the family to respect one another and be there for each other.

1.2 Respect each other

If one person has to wake the others, then everyone must respect that individual. Additionally, the person who has to wake the others must do so respectfully. When both parties show each other respect, the family will have fewer conflicts to deal with, and when everyone is seated at the family table, it will be a time for fewer conflicts and more togetherness.

1.3 Is there a need for a family gathering?

Some people do not see the need for family members to gather; they may believe that family gatherings are a waste of time. On the other hand, some people know how family gatherings have benefitted them.

During family gatherings, family members gain valuable information, including family history. This may even lead to the realisation that people they have known for a long time are actually related to them, something they may never have known if they had refrained from attending the family gathering. No single member of the family has all the answers, but as each person shares their ideas, a common understanding may develop.

For example, if it is an extended family and several people have young children, those with older children may be able to share their experience with those who need guidance. The advice from one family member may be the answer that helps another.

Those family members who work know that some days at work can be very stressful. The stress that some working people experience does not always have anything to do with them. Some customers feel they can say and do whatever they want, and some managers and business owners treat employees in unprofessional ways. Those employees who are stressed may return home after a challenging day and share their concerns and observations with a family member when they sit at the family table. During the discussion, possible solutions may be provided, which may be the specific steps needed to resolve the issues at hand.

1.4 Sharing of traditions and customs

Some families are known for their traditions. As families sit at the table, they may share family traditions and customs passed down from one generation to another.

Parents often enjoy the opportunities when their children, and possibly their grandchildren, are with them at the family table. As they dine together, elderly persons will instil certain values into their children and grandchildren and encourage them to embrace those customs. Not all children may see the benefits of those traditions, but it may be important for them to practise them, since they will need such customs for their future journey.

The wisdom gained by grandparents is passed down from one generation to the next. Some grandchildren clearly remember what their grandparents taught them. Those children often stay connected with their parents, as they feel secure and learn many important traditions. The information shared by some parents at the family table can help other family members avoid problems that may not be easily seen or understood by a young person.

1.5 Opportunities to counsel and motivate family members

When family members gather, they can be motivated by those who offer positive advice. Everyone has challenging moments, but if someone is there for them, they will feel motivated to overcome them.

As the family gather, they provide counselling for one another. This counselling session may help a family member find an appropriate solution to their problems. After the counselling session, the family member who may have been hurt may now feel like a champion and know that there is hope for their future.

For more information about Geary Reid and his books, please use the following contact information:
Amazon: http://www.amazon.com/author/gearyreid
Website: www.reidnlearn.com
Facebook: Reid n Learn
Email: info@reidnlearn.com
Mobile #: 592-645-2240