WHAT do you see when you look in the mirror? Perhaps you may notice your familiar features – the texture of your hair, the shape of your nose or the colour of your skin. You may see a friend whom you have grown to recognise, or a stranger whose flaws are glaringly evident every time you see them. However, if you look closely enough, you will notice something rather interesting. You will notice that you are actually an ancestral puzzle! Our appearance, our traits and our very identity are often a unique amalgamation of pieces of our predecessors that have been passed down through the generations like heirlooms. Our features are the stories of our ancestors, composed by time and spontaneity. We are both extraordinarily unique and very similar to our family members from the past.
Our hair may be a memory of a grandmother who wore it in the same manner that we do. Our smile may resemble that of a great-grandfather. Our hands may have the same shape as a great-aunt who was a painter or a musician. Our very dreams, our ideas, and values may be something we have inherited from predecessors who fought to ensure that future generations would be able to see them realised.
The term “like begets like” is a phrase often used in discussions related to genetics and heredity. The phrase refers to the fact that the offspring of an organism is always similar, if not identical, to the parent organism. Regardless of whether it is a bacterial cell or a human being that creates an offspring, all creatures pass on characteristics through their genes that strongly link their descendants back to themselves and their own predecessors. This principle not only describes a mark of identity, but it is also the key to how populations learn to survive and thrive.
Thus, it is no secret that we resemble our ancestors. Nevertheless, we do not immediately think of our origins every time we glance at a mirror. It is easy for us to dissociate ourselves from our past. It is easy to see ourselves as an isolated mixture of random features that may or may not be linked to other people. As such, it is easy to stop loving this random mixture of features. Regardless of the beauty often woven into the intricate patterns of our faces, if we fail to see the connection behind these features or the person they represent, we lose our connection with ourselves and our subsequent ability to love who we are.
Self-love is a major step that precedes self-actualisation. Most young people struggle with their physical appearance as they learn to understand their own identity and begin to develop a gentle self-love. This struggle is not only a superficial one initiated by the pressure of mass media and peer comparison, but it also runs deep into how we perceive ourselves. It changes the very way we relate to the world around us. The first step to self-love is beginning to realise and accept just how deeply our identities are connected to the past. We are already born whole – apart from growth, there is no other change that needs to be made to make us more complete than we already are.
Therefore, we must learn to love ourselves, simply because we have the extraordinary chance to be whoever we want to be in this world. Let us learn to love ourselves not because we resemble a celebrity or someone we admire, but because there are small pieces within us that have been left by people who are deeply connected to us in many ways. We must love ourselves because it is the only way for us to love the people that we will never have a chance to meet.
The world is in constant need of people who are willing to share their love. Perhaps the deepest and kindest forms of love begin with how we see the person who greets us in the mirror when we look into it. After all, if like begets like, then the love we place into ourselves will surely find itself being reproduced in our actions on the world around us.