by Francis Quamina Farrier
MOST fathers of grown children would have so much to look back on this Father’s Day 2024. It’s another day of reflection, and the hope is that the reflections of the past year, and years gone by, are very pleasant.
However, the reality is that there are a few fathers who have lost a child since Father’s Day 2023. It is always devasting for a parent to lose a child. There is that saying that “A parent should not have to bury a child”. Unfortunately, that most heart-breaking tragedy does occur from time to time. To those fathers who have had such a tragic experience, especially during the past twelve months, we send condolences to you. While we know some of you grieving fathers, there are those who we do not know; men who live quiet lives away from the spotlight.

Nonetheless, we mourn your loss on this special day when you are thinking of the child who has gone before you, and know that they are thinking of you from where they have transitioned.
Unfortunately, some fathers are also estranged from their children. These are fathers who, in some instances, create a situation which results in disrespect from their child; being an alcoholic, for instance. It doesn’t matter where the fault lies, because it is always sad when a father and his children are not speaking.

There is the saying, “For every problem, there is a solution”. As such, whatever might have been the issue that caused deep friction between father and child, every effort should be made to resolve the situation. Of course, that might be easier said than done in quite many cases, but giving it a try is always worthwhile. In such situations, elders in the family can play a most important role as mediators. Family frictions are often resolved during family gatherings, such as at Christmastime, family reunions, birthday parties and, of course, on Mother’s Day and Father’s Day.

TOURING GUYANA WITH YOUR CHILDREN
As an older father, I usually reflect on when I took my then-preteen daughters to many rural and hinterland areas of the country. It was my plan not only to take them along with my wife, Pat, to some of the posh restaurants in the city, but also to many of the far-flung communities of Guyana and see and experience those areas of their native land. I desired to ensure that they knew as much of their native land, beautiful Guyana, as possible. Taking them on such tours was also practical geography lessons. Those tours also gave them practical knowledge of the varying Guyanese accents, the most striking being at Black Bush Polder on the Corentyne Coast, Region Six. As I reflect on those times of their pre-teens, teens, and twenties, I realise there is much to be happy about and to reminisce about with satisfaction.

I am now at a stage of life when I am well qualified to advise younger fathers. Having said that, it is apt to state that I am approached from time to time by younger fathers for advice on many issues of fatherhood. To grandfathers, fathers, especially new fathers, we extend Happy Father’s Day 2024, and wish that you are able to cope with the many challenges of being a good father, here in Guyana, as well as in the Diaspora.