THIS week’s column piece was written to highlight the positives surrounding fatherhood, especially in Guyana. I won’t sugarcoat it when I stress that there are negatives concerning fatherhood in Caribbean societies. Most of it can be traced back to patriarchal practices passed down from colonial days. Nonetheless, I must applaud the efforts and hard work many fathers put into practice daily to ensure their children have everything they want and need in this life. I believe that men themselves are victims of white patriarchal “norms”. There’s a lot of pressure on their roles of being the provider and leader in households, even in our “modern” societies. Sadly, men are negatively generalised under many umbrellas. They also struggle with their own sets of unrealistic and expected gender roles—even if they didn’t ask for it.

Even though the change and progression is slow— there is still a glimpse of hope to look forward to. I see men on my social media, in my community and across Guyana trying to make a difference in their daily roles and responsibilities as a father. Some understand that their privileges to “rule” over the family can be more damaging than effective. Both men and women alike are equally having a say in decision-making in most modern Guyanese households. Of course, there will always be exceptions, but that’s not what we’re discussing today. I’ve also surprisingly spoken to men who even implemented the concept of gentle parenting with their children. Some may say they shouldn’t be applauded for doing the right thing. I say we must acknowledge and welcome good change—no matter how small it is. They are not the enemy. The systems working against us all are.

Without invalidating that of the female experiences, I must say that men have their own sets of discrimination, marginalisation and stereotypes—as anyone on this planet. With that in mind, the roles of genders are shifting, and so is the role of a father. In my opinion, fatherhood extends beyond providing financially for a household. It is more than being the disciplinarian, the household’s protector and “head”. You should include in your roles fixing the injustice that surrounds family roles and gender equity. You should not sit on the sidelines and allow your privileges to undermine your children and partner. As we celebrate Father’s Day, let’s celebrate and acknowledge the men who are trying to right the wrongs of unjust systems that work against their children and partners—instead of trying to be an enabler of it. We see you and we appreciate you.