THERE are only four days left until the new year when people make lots of resolutions. Those who have over-eaten will join the nearest gym (for a while anyway), while others who are aware of their shortcomings will strive to do better. New Year resolutions may be: I will try to be considerate to my girlfriend when she is angry; I will make quality time for my children and wife; I won’t get stressed out, I will find time for me; I will read a book each month to improve my vocabulary.

Whatever your new year resolution may be, why not do some retrospection and identify areas where you could improve your family life. If you are a parent, you can do it because it makes sense to empower your family. You must show care and consideration for your young ones as they grow and develop. Think about the role you play in their lives. Are you fair, wise, reliable and a good role model? Try our quiz to see how your parenting skills are rated. Can you get eight out of eight, correct?

1. Which one of the following is the most important in a parent-child relationship?
a) Dressing alike and looking stylish and trendy
b) Having the same likes and dislikes when it comes to food
c) Having good communication and understanding

2. Children need discipline in their lives because
a) Through discipline, they can gain material wealth
b) Through discipline, they learn acceptable behaviour and self-control
c) Through discipline, they can make new friends

3. Comparing a child negatively to their sibling can make the child
a) Feel sad, resentful and unhappy
b) Feel more affectionate towards their siblings
c) Work harder to get in their parents’ good books

4. Which of the following is the best way to teach morals to children?
a) Tell them, do as I say and not as I do, and they will go far
b) Let them use you, the parent as an example and role model
c) Give them a book on morals and test them on what they have learnt

5. Your child is eliminated from a spelling competition in the first round. Do you?
a) Tell your child you admire his efforts and give him a hug
b) Tell him you are surprised he failed after practising for weeks
c) Tell him the only point in entering a competition is to win

6. The way you treat your child; allows your child to:
a) Be disrespectful and lazy
b) Practise adult behaviour prematurely
c) See themselves through your eyes

7. Children make mistakes and sometimes behave out of context. Do you?
a) Tell them you must punish untoward behaviour because they should know better
b) Explain to them why their behaviour is wrong and unacceptable
c) Show them you are angry by scolding them on the spot, regardless of where they are

8. What is an essential quality a parent should possess?
a) Thoughtfulness
b) Decisiveness
c) Patience

ANSWERS
(1) C: If parents want a good relationship with their children, they need to communicate with them on every level (e.g. physically, emotionally, morally) – starting when they are young. It is never too late to build communication skills and work towards an understanding relationship with children.

(2) B: Children welcome discipline in their lives; it helps them feel secure. When boundaries are set and upheld, children know what they should and should not do and the expected type of behaviour. Children need guidance from loving parents with whom they can interact comfortably.

(3) A: Parents tend to compare their children hoping that the ‘wayward’ child will change and imitate their ‘flawless’ sibling. Children should not have to live up to a sibling’s or parent’s ideal; they are individuals each on their journey. They need to be themselves and should not have to fake their personalities to gain favour from parents.

(4) B: Children learn more from adult behaviour than from adults’ rules and regulations. If fathers are loving, honest and fair-minded, children will learn these qualities naturally. Parents are always a child’s first role models.

(5) A: Children need praise and encouragement from their loved ones – even if they are unsuccessful at events and competitions. When parents belittle their efforts, it can prevent children from trying in the future. Parents should teach good sportsmanship, how to lose gracefully and how to win modestly.

(6) C: Children see themselves through their parents’ eyes, so if treated with disrespect and loathing, their behaviour will portray the same. It is also likely they will experience low self-esteem. When parents are loving, and considerate children tend to be confident and contented.

(7) B: When adults make mistakes, there is hardly any reprimand; but when children make mistakes, sometimes adults punish them. Instead, adults should explain unacceptable behaviour and the consequences thereof to children. It is not the child who is intolerable but their behaviour; parents should not confuse the two. Children should always feel loved and appreciated by parents; even when they’ve done wrong.

(8) C: Parents need to be patient with children at every stage of their development. Calmness and self-control are essential attributes of parenting, allowing for logical, unemotional and balanced decision-making. Children need room to make mistakes and learn from their actions – this process leads to their growth and development.

A BLESSED AND PROSPEROUS 2022 TO YOU AND YOUR FAMILY
FROM THE CHILDCARE AND PROTECTION AGENCY
If you are concerned about the welfare of a child, call the CPA hotline on 227 0979 or write to us at childcaregy@gmail.com
A MESSAGE FROM THE CHILDCARE AND PROTECTION AGENCY,
MINISTRY OF HUMAN SERVICES AND SOCIAL SECURITY