YOU can turn a blind eye to it or bury your head in the sand, but child sexual abuse is real and happening in your community. It is concealed and hardly noticeable when you visit households, but that’s because it is shrouded in secrecy, and children are too ashamed or frightened to tell.
Sometimes there are clues or indications that something is not quite right. A child may seem withdrawn and behave unusually quiet or, on the other hand, may exhibit loud attention-seeking behaviour. These could or could not be signs that something is wrong. The average person is not trained to recognise child sexual abuse, but most people, trained or untrained, can sense when something is amiss where children are concerned.
Child sexual abuse is when adults force or make children indulge in anything of a sexual nature. It could be physical, such as fondling, touching or rubbing private parts, to penetration actual sexual intercourse. Watching explicit porn or X-rated movies with children is also child sexual abuse and punishable by law.
Many children feel guilty once they’ve experienced abuse – as if it is their fault. So they do not tell anyone; they internalise the abusive episode. If a child does not confide in an adult the first time abuse occurs, it is harder to speak up on subsequent occasions. A trusted family friend, a neighbour, an uncle or a football coach may tell the child, ‘it’s just our little secret, you hear? Don’t tell anyone’. And a confused, innocent child will comply.
Child sex offenders look the same as everyone else. They are hard to identify; they mingle in society like ordinary people and strike when they’ve snared an innocent victim. Some perpetrators may be charged and prosecuted under the Sexual Offences Act (2010) but do not spend decades in jail, which means there is not a strong enough deterrent to prevent offenders from sexually abusing children.
Some perpetrators cleverly ‘groom’ children by getting into their minds over time until they become a part of the child. The child could be 5 or 18 years old, it makes no difference; once fooled, the child is trapped in a sordid world and manipulated and used for gratification. Some children feel compelled to indulge, out of a warped sense of loyalty – totally unaware the offender is taking advantage of their naivety.
When we hear about child sexual abuse, our first thoughts turn to big worthless men abusing girl children. But children as young as 22 months, boys and girls, have suffered abuse. Women and older girls abuse younger girls too. Boys are abused by older boys, men and women also. Therefore, child sexual abuse can take many forms regardless of religion, ethnicity, race, background or social standing.
Most adults would ask the question, ‘why does the victim keep going back to the offender? Why not stay out of his way? Or why doesn’t the victim scream and run for help or tell their mother or father? The truth is, children, feel physically and psychologically trapped by sexual abuse. It is a perplexing intrusion to their childhood.
Sometimes the abuser is someone they have known all their lives, someone whom they love and trust. It may be a pleasant family friend (man or woman) who behaves normally around others but violates the child once they’re alone. Most children are not empowered to speak out about abuse or attempted abuse, and others know adults will not believe them or feel they would be blamed (instead of the perpetrator). Children will not disclose their fate unless they have a trusted, level-headed, non-judgmental adult in whom they can confide.
Dysfunctional households where adults are negligent towards their children’s needs are breeding grounds for child sexual abuse. If sexual abuse occurs, it is unlikely that the parents will seek justice or counselling on the child’s behalf.
They would more likely cover up the violation or accept payment to hush up the abuse. Parents may dismiss the traumatic episode as bad luck, particularly if either parent suffered sexual abuse during his/her upbringing. Scarred children become damaged adults who suffer the ramification of sexual abuse for the rest of their lives.
Older siblings may take advantage of their younger sibling’s sexual innocence in households with distinct differences in ages, and trick them into incestuous behaviour. The abuse might occur during the context of play, and the younger sibling, unaware that he/she is a victim, may even find these occasions enjoyable, although they are wrong and against the laws of Guyana. In such cases, children fail to identify themselves as victims of sibling incest.
Some families foster incestuous behaviour subtly. Everyone knows what is going on, but no one talks about it or reveals the secret to people outside their household. Mothers ignore the tell-tale signs, and even if the child complains, the mother shrugs it off, changes the subject or chases the child away.
It can be a brutal world for sexually abused children. Unless someone reports their dilemma to people who can help, a dismal ‘adult existence’ awaits them. If you suspect or know that a child is suffering from sexual or other abuse, call the CPA hotline to make a report on the number below. You can remain anonymous if you choose, but please find it in your heart to help a child today.
If you are concerned about the welfare of a child, call the CPA hotline on 227 0979 or write to us at childcaregy@gmail.com
A MESSAGE FROM THE CHILDCARE AND PROTECTION AGENCY,
MINISTRY OF HUMAN SERVICES AND SOCIAL SECURITY
