EACH week, for the past five weeks or so, I’ve used this space to share my thoughts on the seemingly ever-evolving COVID-19 pandemic and I was oddly surprised when I realised that I hadn’t yet taken the time to address the need for empathy during this period of anxiety.

As a disclaimer, let me say that empathy (or understanding and navigating feelings, generally) is something I’ve only recently begun actively learning about, since, for most of my adult life (not that it’s been very long), I did not see the importance of this. However, the upheaval in my life caused by my move to Trinidad to study and more recently, the COVID-19 pandemic, have both contributed to my newfound appreciation for empathy and emotional awareness.

The novel coronavirus and COVID-19 are an unexpected and unprecedented disruptions in my life, as I have become accustomed to. I’ve written articles about the ramifications of this pandemic on the economy, on health and wellness (including mental health and mental wellness), businesses and generally, on daily life for the average Joe. And while I like to think I have a general idea of the impact, much of that is only what’s in my imagination. So then, how is it that I feel some sort of deep emotion in my chest (or somewhere in that general area, wherever feelings are felt) whenever I think about how people are responding to this situation?

I didn’t want to parade as an expert and go on talking about empathy and feelings, and kindness and all those words that I can easily throw around to sound like a decent human being. So I thought about reading and learning first, and luckily, my friends have been gently pushing in this area for some time now, so, finding material wasn’t difficult.

I revisited a video by Brené Brown on what is “empathy”, which also spoke about distinguishing empathy from sympathy. A loved one sent this video to me in April last year, and I looked at it only because she told me to (not very ‘decent human being’ of me); I didn’t genuinely internalise it. One year later, I have seen the error in my ways.

Brené shared that empathy is a choice that people make, and a vulnerable choice at that, to position yourself in someone else’s perspective. It encompasses four tenets: perspective-taking, staying out of judgement, recognising emotion in other people and communicating.

Essentially, she said, “Empathy is feeling with people.”

Shinelle Bayrd, Founder and President of The Wellness Centre (TWC), a local mental health support organisation, shared with me recently that this pandemic is not only a global health crisis, but it is also a global mental health crisis. Due to the measures taken to reduce the spread of COVID-19, and COVID-19 itself, she indicated that persons are going to feel increasingly anxious because of the reality with which they have to contend, which is also influenced by their varying personal experiences.

Empathy isn’t only about those things that I can connect to personally, but it is also about connecting with people, without having the personal connection to whatever they’re experiencing. According to Brené, a response rarely ever helps someone (especially if you try to paint a person’s situation with a silver lining), but it is the simple fact of recognising and understanding that someone is going through something that adversely affects them that shows your empathy.

I feel for people who aren’t going to be rescued by institutional safety nets and welfare programmes during this pandemic, and people who are part of the informal sectors of the economy, who have no choice but to face the threat of COVID-19 to earn an income. I also feel for people who have been forced to stay at home in situations that aren’t the best for their health and wel-being. Though I believe that this bit of empathy is drawn from my reality, it is a start in being a more compassionate person. And I would hope that from reading this, this is something that you all would think about too.

When I reread these words I’ve written here, I’m probably going to feel very awkward and convince myself this is a ‘cringey’ piece. I’ll probably also think about how weird people might think I am after reading this, and chastise myself for not writing on a less personal topic, such as the consequences of this past week’s slump in oil prices for Guyana (you can read my article on that on the Guyana Chronicle’s website, nevertheless). But, that’s alright. I’m learning to be okay with those thoughts and feelings and I’m learning that these words may also be just as important to somebody else.

Love & Light.