TODAY, Guyana and the world over will be celebrating another observance of Mother’s Day. For most families and households, this day usually begins with attending religious worship, followed by a special family breakfast.
But there is mostly the larger family gathering for lunch, where mother and grandmother, if present, are showered with praises and gifts, in addition to assurances of continuous love and affection from their children and grandchildren.
Absolutely, all mothers have every right to be pampered and loved for what they have been/are to their children and grandchildren –family, inclusive of husband/companion.
However, a mother at home may cook every day, wash each week, and deal with cleaning something or someone in the house every day. She will teach her child/children to read, write, count and numerous other things. She is even their doctor from time to time, with home remedies and old school advice about life. She subsidises our catering, babysitting and educational cost. No matter (if you are) a minister, politician, businessman, woman entrepreneur, all began in the womb of a mother. All started their early years with a mother.
That mothers have become the bedrock of most families is a universal given, that is undisputed, given its pervasive global fact. Even in marked patriarchal societies, it is the female, who, as both wife and mother, is expected to manage the home, inclusive of bringing up the children.
As UN Women’s report, Progress of the World’s Women documents, women have become more visible in the paid economy in recent years in many countries. However, women’s other works, their unpaid work to produce and sustain families, which is no less valuable, is typically unrecognised and invisible.
The reality of family life everywhere is one identified by the woman, who has become the symbol representative of her family, attending social situations such as Parent-Teacher Association meetings, answering a summon to her child/children’s school in any issue of discipline, and matters pertaining to scholastic performance; taking her children to social gatherings and seeking medical attention. At religious gatherings, the presence of the mother is predominant, most times outnumbering the male presence.
It is tradition for children to mostly confide in their mothers, not only because of the natural mother-and-child bond, or because of this increasing modern-day phenomenon – the absence of fathers and the wide perception that the latter would be less sympathetic; but also because of the proven fact that mothers are always ready and willing to give a sympathetic and caring ear to whatever challenge/crisis situation the child may be encountering and even to offer advice, that is traditionally known to include finding solutions and giving leadership.
The fact is that mothers have taken pre-eminence in leading their families even where fathers are present, and in the wider phenomenon as single parent. The latter has exemplified the true role of today’s mothers, whether working class or professional. She is seen as that tower of strength and reassuring calm; a rock for refuge, and a symbol of stability.
Many of today’s younger generation have attested to the fact, of their mothers being the strong support and influence in their growth and upbringing and even their successes when their fathers would have abandoned responsibilities, not even contributing as is morally and legally obligated in such post – circumstance.
But despite so much more responsibilities that mothers do have to shoulder in these modern times, because of irresponsible/uncooperative fathers, they now have to cope with the added, daily burden of domestic violence that have taken the lives of so many of their counterparts, while leaving others with life-crippling infirmities.
This is indeed a sad and tragic commentary as to the modern position of mothers, many of whom are mentally and physically degraded in the presence of their children. It is grievous and unacceptable that children are also in the habit of abusing their mothers in all forms.
Too many mothers, who would have singlehandedly invested so much in the upbringing and educational growth and development of their children, are abandoned and forgotten, often having to seek refuge in institutions or on the streets. There have been so many mothers who have had to die lonely and grief-stricken, because of gross, cruel indifference from their children.
But there are, of course, children who have been dutiful to their mothers, continuously giving love, showing kindness and are materially supportive, whether it is Mother’s Day or not. Such progeny should be commended!.
We all know being a mother is a full-time job, whether you have a career to juggle or not. But how much is all that unpaid labour that mothers put into raising a family actually worth? They work, they cook, they clean, they take care of us when we’re sick and when we’re well, and they love us unconditionally.
If women stopped doing unpaid care work, if they stopped having children, nurturing them, and rounding them into productive and creative human beings, there would be no labour force and the global economy would grind to a halt.
So, beyond this one day when mothers receive cards, gifts and flowers as tokens of appreciation, from their families, this is also a moment to look at how societies and economies recognise and reward the work of mothers, and women more broadly.
Thus mothers who have given birth or have mothered others deserve to be praised and treated kindly every day, particularly as they advance to the vulnerable senior years of their lives.
Such an opportunity to acknowledge a mother’s love must be taken when they are alive and not when they are being readied for their final journey – Mother’s Day is every day, not just today, the official Mother’s Day!