A WOMAN who decided to foster a child did so with the best of intentions. She approached the Child Care and Protection Agency and went through the process that qualified her to become a foster parent. Soon she was matched with a four-year-old girl who had been severely neglected, and could barely talk. However, from their initial meeting, they seemed to bond.The foster mother didn’t mind that the girl wore ‘pampers’ at bedtime, as she realised it was part of her job to wean the child off ‘pampers’ and teach her how to use the potty during the night.
This turned out to be a much harder task than she could have ever imagined. She tried many strategies, but the child still managed to ‘pee the bed’; she felt defeated.
Every morning there were bed clothes to wash and a little girl who needed a ‘good’ bath with sweet soap. She decided the safest bet was to continue using the ‘pampers,’ at least for the time being.
Due to neglect, the child’s teeth were very weak, so before each meal the foster mother would either cut up or mash the child’s food with a fork. She took the child to a dentist to see what could be done to help the child’s second set of teeth come through healthily.
When her foster mother was asleep, the child had a habit of taking food from the fridge and hiding it under her bed. The foster mother however, was adamant that with patience and in time, she could encourage the child to stop this unacceptable behaviour and also win the war on the night-time pampers scenario too.
It came to an end the night the foster mother tied one end of a string to the child’s wrist and the other end on her own: this would alert her should the child get up during the night, for any reason. The child did get up and she was alerted: stopping the child in her tracks as she headed for the kitchen, she took her back to the bedroom where she took off her pampers and placed her on the potty. Funnily enough after that night there were no more midnight jaunts and the child began using the potty during the night all on her own.
Now who do you think is the very special person? Is it the neglected child who needs a lot of care, patience, attention, love and nurturing to get to a comfortable, confident place in life? Or is it the foster parent, who understands that the behaviour the child is exhibiting is due to the adults who failed her during the first few years of her life? The truth is they are both special. Fostering is about those who need special care and those are able to give it.
Potential foster parents must realise that children who have been abused or who have spent time in residential/institutional care need time and patience, nurturing and love. It can be a long or short journey, but the more love and understanding they receive, the more they tend to respond.
This month is Foster Care Month and there are over 600 children living in institutional/residential care in Guyana. Most of them would love to spend time with a caring adult. Do you have what it takes to make a difference in the life of a child? Are you a very special person?
If you would like to find out more about fostering a child, call the foster care team on 227-4082; 227-0138; and if you are concerned about the welfare of a child, ring the CPA hotline on 227 0979
A MESSAGE FROM THE CHILDCARE AND PROTECTION AGENCY, MINISTRY OF SOCIAL PROTECTION