Being a parent

BEING a parent is a special responsibility, and parenting is a very important role. There are no hard and fast rules when it comes to parenting, but there are some principal factors that can help every parent do a reasonably good job of parenting.If you are a parent, how do you rate on the PARENTING CHECK LIST? Answer the questions below and score yourself from 1 to 3. If your answer is NEVER, you circle (1); if your answer is SOMETIMES, you circle (2); and if your answer is ALWAYS, you circle (3):
(1) Do you spend quality time with your child/ren, talking to them, listening to them and encouraging them? (1) (2) (3)
(2) Do you accept that children (and people in general) make mistakes and therefore find alternative ways to reprimand them rather than beat them? (1) (2) (3)
(3) Do you make sure that your child attends school regularly, and do you help with homework? (1) (2) (3)
(3) Do you show your child love and affection with hugs, kisses, praise and encouragement? (1) (2) (3)
(4) Do you build your child’s self-esteem and confidence by pointing out his/her positive attributes rather than ridiculing his/her negative ones? (1) (2) (3)
(5) Do you have, and stick to, clear guidelines and boundaries for your child; but sometimes need to adjust, depending on the circumstances? (1) (2) (3)
(6) Do you think you are a consistently good role model for your child? (1) (2) (3)
(7) Do you make sure that your child feels safe and secure at all times? (1) (2) (3)
(8) Do you talk to your child in a respectful manner? (1) (2) (3)
(9) Do you ask for, and consider, your child’s opinion when you are making decisions that will affect that child? (if the child is old enough to make a valid contribution) (1) (2) (3)
(10) If you are separated from your partner, do you encourage your child to have a healthy relationship with his/her other parent (mother/father) despite your personal feelings? (1) (2) (3)
(11) Do you teach your child morals, values and manners of a high standard that will help them through life? (1) (2) (3)
(12) Does your child speak openly to you about the things that go on in his/her life? (1) (2) (3)

Now, add up your score. If your total is between 12 and 18, you could be missing out on the chance to nurture and maintain a good relationship with your child/ren. Try sharing in the small things that matter to them, and do so with an open mind. Do a parental self-assessment; be honest, which areas can you improve?

If your score is between 18 and 27, you seem to have positive attributes that make you a thoughtful parent. However, you may need to modify your approach in some areas as your child/ren grow older and the dynamics of your relationship change. Be prepared, remember to grow with your child.

If your score is between 27 and 36, you seem to be doing a good job with your child/ren, from which you should reap the benefits as they grow older. Remember to stay ‘in tune’ with your child/ren, and not become complacent or take for granted that things are okay. Always keep the lines of communication open.

PARENTING TIP: Parenting is not about wrong versus right; it is about being effective or ineffective. If you are concerned about the welfare of a child, call the Childcare and Protection Hotline on 227-0979, or write to us at childcaregy@gmail.com