Hello Everyone,

I hope this week has treated you well.
Today I would like to talk about bullying, which most of us see, experience or even do on a daily basis. It is very harmful to our mental health and yet still so prominent. Bullying does not happen only to children in a classroom- it happens to people of all ages, gender, ethnicities and statuses.

So, what is bullying?
This occurs when an individual tires to overpower, influence, intimidate or force someone into doing something; it is always unwanted, repeated and can be physical, verbal or emotional.
Bullying/ harassment usually occurs when an individual recognises an imbalance of power- both physical and social. It can happen anywhere – in school, in the workplace, prisons, in neighbourhoods and even at home. It can involve one on one bullying or can happen by a group. If bullying is done by a group, it is called mobbing.
Overall, there are many times of bullying.

“Being bullied is not a harmless rite of passage or an inevitable part of growing up; it has serious long-term consequences. It is important for schools, health services and other agencies to work together to reduce bullying and the adverse effects related to it.” – Dr. Wolke

1. Physical. This involves hurting a person or their possessions, for example, a physical attack such as hitting, pushing etc. or breaking someone’s belongings, destroying someone’s property, stealing etc. Bullying does not usually begin with the physical, but rather evolves to it from emotional and verbal abuse. Men are more likely than women to conduct physical bullying.

2. Verbal such as threats, teasing/name calling etc. This is the most common type of bullying and has longer- lasting effects than any other type.

3. Social. This includes purposely excluding someone, spreading rumors, cyber-bullying etc. Cyber-bullying involves any kind of technological device and therefore includes phone calls, texts, emails or social networking sites such as Facebook or Instagram. Cyber bullying is the type I see most of all. For younger generations, it is the most undetected as there is usually a lack of parental supervision on social media. Also, one can pose as someone else or be completely anonymous and therefore can display any amount of cruelty possible.
Women are more likely than men to conduct verbal and social bullying.

Why does bullying happen?
Many studies have shown that jealously, envy and resentment are the main causes of bullying. It’s surprising but bullies usually have low self-esteem themselves which forces them to want others to also feel low. By demeaning others, a bully feels empowered.
People who experience symptoms of depression, poor academic performance, high aggression and personality disorders are also more likely than the average person to become a bully. Bullying is also a cycle. Many people bully because they, themselves are being bullied elsewhere. A child from an abusive household is more likely to be a bully. They are likely to take this out on other people which is called Psychological projection.
Bullying also happens when the victim is different from the majority. For example, there is disability bullying which usually occurs when the individual is visibly disabled such as wheel-chairs or physical deformity. However, it can also happen to those with mental issues such as learning disabilities. There is also sexual orientation bullying – also known as gay bashing. Unfortunately, this is very common in Guyana and leads to many murders and suicides.

What can bulling/harassment cause?
Bullying has a lasting effect on a person’s mental health.
A victim of bullying more often than not feels depressed, weak, negative, isolated, lonely and lacks self-esteem and courage. They are usually afraid and unwilling to attend school or work. This results in poor academic performance, high stress levels, anxiety and a loss of interest in previously enjoyed activities which causes further depression, isolation, psychological trauma, social exclusion, aggression/rage and self-hatred.
Individuals who are bullied are also more likely to have trouble eating and sleeping, use drugs and alcohol as well as consider suicide.
On the other side of the scale, bullying can also cause a victim to become very violent. Research on the adolescent years of famous serial killers report consistent bullying.
Believe it or not, bullying also harms the bully. Sure, it’s hard to feel sorry for someone who intentionally hurts other people but the truth is, bullies also have long-lasting emotional problems. They have trouble relating to their peers as they are initially unpleasant and cruel –which causes them to not have many friends in the first place.
Bullies are also a great risk for alcohol and drug abuse, violence and school drop -out.

What to do when you are being bullied/harassed?
As always, prevention is the best route. Hold seminars/campaigns and educate individuals on the harms of bullying.
Also, step up and say something! Observers play a major role in bullying as well. Bullying can occur in an isolated place yes, but typically it happens when other people are around as the bully mostly needs an audience.
There are many reasons why bystanders choose not to get involved such a fear that they may be the next target or believing it to be none of their business. The truth is – bystanders themselves are also more likely to have depression, use alcohol and other drugs and skip school out of fear. Observing without intervening is harmful to everyone.

How many of us do this without even noticing or simply thinking it is harmless. We need to pay attention to our behaviour and how it affects others (and ourselves). It is so prominent that I truly believe that if you are not being bullied, you’re probably the bully and you probably don’t even know it. Pay attention to your words!
Thanks for reading! Please continue to write in to caitlinvieira@gmail.com and let me know what you would like to talk about. OR come see me at Woodlands Hospital Outpatient Department. For issues with alcohol/ drug abuse: Mondays at 4:30pm. For general mental health issues: Wednesdays at 4:30pm.
Say Yes to Life and No to Drugs! Always!