THE human condition presupposes certain humane qualities as a norm. However, events in history have proven this perception to be a fallacious expectation, demonstrating throughout the existence of mankind that there are more Cains than Abels in the family of mankind. There are many forms of beasts in human bodies, and those who commit personal violence on family members whom they are supposed to protect and care for are some of the most bestial.
Domestic violence has reached epidemic proportions, and, given its almost daily, unabated occurrences — many times to the extent of murder– it seems there is an escalation rather than a deceleration of violent episodes within family enclaves. This is a clear threat to the very existence of the important institution of the family, the consequences being dislocation at every level of the family unit, with children being the ultimate victims.
Many times, the culmination of an abusive situation is murder and/or murder/suicide – fatal consequences which violently terminate the life of one or both spouse. However, most of these incidences result in the death of the wife, with the husband being jailed for long enough durations that the children virtually become orphans.
Sometimes the injuries received as a result of such battery leaves crippling injuries which, to all intents and purposes, practically leaves her crippled – unable to fend for herself, much less her children, for the rest of her life.
Inescapable is the fact that one parent being continuously battered by another in the presence of her family leaves lifelong psychological and emotional scars on the children, with consequential aberrant behaviour in their adult lives.
Without disregarding the fact that men do have their share of interpersonal frustrations, and are sometimes unable to effect solutions to problems, a mature, right-thinking man ought not to vent his ire on any family member. Resorting to such murderous acts can never resolve problems, but perpetuate them instead.
Virtually negligible in males who indulge in substance abuse is the resort to dialogue and discussion, which is pivotal to the resolution of problems: Instead hectoring and abuse of family members by males who are frustrated by their own failings seem to be their panacea for their shortcomings.
As a result, the overwhelming evidence, thus far, is of women being brutalised for years at the hands of their husbands/companions, often suffering injuries, until their lives are finally extinguished.
The spontaneous nature of sadistic attacks on helpless family members is sometimes encouraged by other family members with a grudge against the victims, or even neighbours who see the consequences of their strive-making as a side-show for their titillation – home-grown entertainment.
The victims who are killed are made victims again when they are no longer able to defend themselves and the perpetrators and their families, in attempts to prove that the man was rendered temporarily insane through a fit of jealously, accuse the woman of immoral actions and infidelity.
An abusive male spouse degrades his manhood, because he is responsible for the protection of his family, their emotional and psychological wellbeing; and for the provision of their needs. Abusing his wife decimates her dignity in the wider society, and compromises her very important role of motherhood.
Traumatising his children through his violent, irrational actions gradually undermines the family foundation, with the children often in turn becoming wayward.
This catalyses dangerous, psychological traumas in children who are forced to witness the excruciating pain inflicted by their father on their helpless mother, which often eventuates in catastrophic consequences in a never-ending cycle of aberrant behaviour.
Unless and until men learn to contain the beast within, the scourge of domestic violence and its disastrous fallout will forever reverberate in the soul of families and nations.