CHRISTMAS is a time of sharing and caring, and, as we know, much spending. This notwithstanding, many see Christmas as a time for the children, and here there is concurrence from the overwhelming majority. This is so to the extent that many parents plan well in advance of the occasion to ensure their children are adequately taken care of, and know and experience the true joys of Christmas.
Despite this, there are still a lot of children who, for one reason or another, are still being denied the joys their classmates or other friends experience at Christmas; and ultimately, for them, Christmas is greeted with some degree of sadness.
Why sadness? Because they know that whereas their friends will be showered with gifts, have lots to eat and drink, wear fancy clothes to go to church and attend Christmas parties, and even be able to help mom and dad hang decorations up on a Christmas tree, they cannot.
As the global economic crisis continues to take its toll, it is becoming increasingly difficult for many low-income householders to be able to give their children that ‘real treat ‘for Christmas. And there are some children in homes where, even though they may have a reasonable meal of which to partake, there is still sadness, because, unlike the average home where mom and dad can sit around the breakfast or dinner table, daddy is absent, and so cannot join them in having a sumptuous meal and prayer before consuming that meal. Under such circumstances, mom is invariably the lone parent figure to share the meal with them, but she is too busy doing other things in the home – the burden of which rests squarely on her shoulders.
More often than not, by the time she is ready to sit down to have her meal, the children would have already eaten and moved off.
And therein lies the paradigm of the absentee father figure, be it for legitimate reasons or through sheer delinquency, the child ends up hurting.
There are myriad such stories, and each time they are repeated they bring with them a measure of sadness. Thank God for those homes where children know the true joy of being able to have a really happy Christmas with the entire family.
Over the last few days, the Sunday Chronicle spoke with a few children, in order to have their perspectives of what Christmas is; what it means to them; if they believe in Santa, and what they would like to have as gifts this Christmas.
Interestingly, most felt that Christmas was a time when ‘mommy and daddy’ would dress up the home with a Christmas tree; cook lots of food like pepper-pot, black cake and plenty of drink; and take them to Church and Christmas parties, and to visit grand-parents and some dear old aunt. The smaller ones said they believed in Santa, whilst insisting that there is no Santa Claus, and that the gifts children get are bought by ‘mommy’.
I managed to silently read through the lines, realising that within their homes there was no real Christmas, and that a visit to grandma or some better-off aunt was their opportunity to get a Christmas.
As for gifts, no child could envision Christmas without this. This was their concept of Christmas, but asked how many of them actually get gifts, the response was disappointing. Howbeit, they still felt that getting a gift was of paramount importance; that, in general terms, children should receive gifts from their parents at Christmas time.My next question was: “What gift would you like for Christmas, were you to get them? The majority of boys responded that they would like a motor car with a remote control. Others said they wanted a bicycle, and one child said he wanted a toy gun.
I was very moved when the first boy, about eight years old, gave me his reasons for wanting a bicycle. “Miss, I want a bicycle so I could ride to school, because I live in Sophia and go to school in TucVille, You see, mommy does not always have money to give us for bus fare, and so sometimes I reach to school late, and I don’t like that. If I have a bicycle, I could ride to school. I can also use the bicycle to go and do things for my mother, like going to the shop or other little errands,” he said. I was moved, very impressed.
Here was an eight-year-old boy who impulsively replied, putting school first; who recognised the importance of punctuality, and was disciplined enough to know that it is not okay to arrive at school late; and moreover, had a heart of love and consideration for his mother. He saw the necessity for his mother to work with ease, comfort, and be able to get what was needed in the home without hassle or undue delay, and so he thought a bicycle was the ideal multi-purpose instrument. At no time did he put play first, or suggest he could go riding with his friends.
Others called for dolls, story books and games. But the reality of the situation was that the majority of those children sharing their perspectives of Christmas and stating what they wanted for the occasion were from poor, single-headed households; and come Christmas Day and beyond, they would still not be able to get those toys or gifts they so much wanted.
You may well imagine that, having answered my questions, they popped one at me; and, starry eyes, full of optimism and almost in glee, their single question to me was, “Miss, so when we getting the toys?” I was able to deal with that.
For some of them, being able to access those gifts they so badly want remains but an illusion. I was, there and then, reminded of the words of Joan Baez:
“Perhaps the pictures in the Time
Should no longer be put in rhymes
When all the eyes of starving children are wide open ….
Do you hear the voices in the night, Bobby? They’re crying,
See the children in the morning light, Bobby?”
Spare them a thought at Christmas
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