Last Tuesday, my Social Psychology class completed a ‘Day of Compassion’ assignment. For my column-writing this week, I decided to share the experience with you as well.
To be compassionate simply means to feel pity for someone and their circumstances and then act upon that feeling by trying to help them in any way possible. Our assignment did not restrict the number of persons, gender, race, the relationship we have with the recipients- nothing whatsoever.

I believe we should also use that same principle in our everyday lifestyles. To help selflessly without expecting for anything in return, to me, it’s more of a skill that not many people can master. Most of us always want something, but we refuse to give at the same time. I am a ‘picky’ compassionate person. I help people majority of the times only when they ask me to and I would only help people I know or that I’m close to. On my ‘Day of Compassion,’ I still chose my close friends and family. I guess it’s because I am most comfortable around them. I invited some of my high school friends over and pampered them by doing their make-up. I cooked lunch for my dad, my grandmother and my uncle and I actually came out of my comfort zone and gave money to the destitute. My efforts were all small but significant in their own ways. Significance is very important and your efforts will be determined by the significance of the act. Me cooking for my dad and it was mandatory because my mother was away on vacation. My grandmother also is not well, so why not help her feel better with my exquisite cooking? My friends had a long week at school and work, so why not help them be relaxed instead of being another stress factor? The beggar on the road is half-clothed and also looks like he is homeless, why not help him get a warm comfy sweater or something to eat, in my case; money? I asked myself all of these questions to help me shed light on the significance of my actions.

Being compassionate all the time takes a toll on you. Sometimes you might feel lost and wandering about for your sense of self. Constantly helping others can leave you at a disadvantage because some people will abuse your efforts and will to help them. However, it is up to you to decide who to help, how to help them and what your limits are. If you are currently or planning to be a ‘professional helper’ AKA. a doctor, nurse, teacher, social worker or worker in any other ‘helping field,’ it is important that you learn how to be compassionate.

One part of the assignment asked us, ‘what restricts you from being compassionate?’ Personally, the fear of not pleasing people or doing enough for them holds me back. Or what if I make a bigger mess of the situation? What if it makes me look weak? I refuse to be compassionate if I truly know I cannot fully or efficiently help you. After that assignment, I cringe every time I read the line, ‘I refuse to be compassionate…’ Unless someone blatantly declines my help then why should I, should we, refuse to be compassionate towards each other?

If our compassion does not include ourselves, it is incomplete, one writer said. ‘If it’s one person who deserves your help the most, it’s yourself. You cannot give what you do not have. As such, if there is not a sense of compassion within yourself; helping yourself get back up when times are tough, giving yourself the love and kindness you deserve, then there is no way you can comprehend through compassion and ultimately show it to others.

I have mentioned this in a previous writing but volunteerism is a great way to help selflessly. I have always admired the work that NGOs, youth organisations, social-problem groups, etc. undertake. Their objectives are built on the definition of compassion.

Volunteering with any group for a good cause is a great way to show compassion to your society, community and even country at large.

Do you remember the assignment I mentioned earlier? I’d like for you all to do the same. Take a day to be compassionate and eventually let that day reflect your lifestyle. Evaluate which version of yourself you prefer; the ‘Day of Compassion you’ or ‘normal you’, who you’d like to be compassionate to, what restricts you from being compassionate on a daily basis. Also, surround yourself with kind and compassionate souls. Their behaviour would eventually rub off on you. Perhaps I have said this before but I wouldn’t say the same thing twice if it didn’t have any significance or importance, ‘Your service to others is the rent you pay for your room here on Earth.’
How do you plan on paying yours?