Relapse | How to move forward or avoid it completely

LAST week’s column on how to come off alcohol completely got so many responses.

Particularly, after you have detoxed, what is the next step? I received at least three emails where the individual has been off of alcohol for a few days or weeks and they aren’t sure where to go from there. Even more so, they are wondering how to stay off of the alcohol. The question they are asking is how to avoid a relapse and that’s just what I’m about to tell you.

Be prepared. There are many reasons why people may relapse but there are universal triggers that everyone could look out for. The most common cause of relapse is withdrawal which I mentioned can be the physical or mental detox of the drug; a process that can last a few days, weeks or months. One is also more likely to relapse if they do not develop new and healthy coping skills, practice good self-care or consistently work on their relationships.
Completely detoxing from alcohol can actually be the easy part while the hard part is living a life without alcohol, especially if it was a part of your daily life.

The best and most successful form of treatment for alcohol abuse covers a variety of options such as medication, personal counselling and group meetings.

Prescription medication is recommended by your doctor to ease any withdrawal symptoms that you may have. It is also prescribed if the individual has any underlying mental illnesses such as depression or anxiety as these make one more likely to have a relapse.

Those who do counselling to explore why they drank in the first place as well as to explore their goals, relationships, coping strategies etc. are more likely to remain abstinent.

If you are even one day off of alcohol, you are taking a huge step forward. For now, these are the steps and little tips that can help you to remain abstinent.

First and most important, be consistent with your treatment. If you are taking medication, continue to; if you are going to counselling, continue to go. If you are going to the AA meetings, make time for them every week. The biggest mistake people make is to discontinue their treatment the moment they start to feel better or stronger when the reason you are feeling that way is due to the treatment. If you attended (or planning to attend) the AA meetings that I told you guys about, they have some factors that tremendously help with avoiding relapse. Some people work the 12 step programme and others get a sponsor – which is someone you can reach out to if you feel you may be on the verge of relapse. These are people who have been through the programme and the 12 steps themselves so they are completely relatable.

Accept that you will have cravings. Don’t fight them but rather distract yourself with healthy coping. If you don’t give in, the average urge to drink will pass in 15-30 minutes. Don’t panic when this happens – it’s normal and does not mean you cannot do it or that the urges will never go away.

Continue to avoid high-risk situations and triggers. These are different for everyone and can be people, places or things. The main trigger will obviously be alcohol itself so you shouldn’t keep any in the house or workspace. However, remember that these are just external triggers. Internal triggers are your own thoughts that may lead you to drink.

Examples are ‘I will never stop so I may as well continue to drink’ or ‘it will only be one drink today.’ However, don’t try and push out these thoughts. Play them through in a realistic way and use them to your advantage. For example, if you think ‘it will only be one drink’ – play that thought through until the next day. You may give in and have the one drink which will definitely lead to more. You will then have too much and wake up the next day feeling bad about yourself and regretting your decision. Then you may think that you are hopeless and can never stop so you will continue to drink. Play the vicious cycle out in your head.

Continue to practice healthy coping skills. What are you doing when you are angry or sad? When you stop drinking, it will become apparent how much time you spent obtaining, drinking and recovering from alcohol. You are now going to have to find something to fill that time; something that makes you feel good and not miss alcohol.

This goes into finding healthy substitutes. This can be literal for the alcohol or just a hobby you can take part in as a distraction. It is hard for us to just give up habits without some sort of substitute. For example, people who used to drink vodka will now only drink soft drink and lime when they are out. It eases the cravings for them and you can find your own. However, if you drink something similar and it brings on cravings, then it is working as a trigger rather than a substitute- only you can tell the difference.

Live a healthy life. You have already started this the day you decided to stop drinking but one is more likely to remain alcohol-free if they are eating and sleeping well. Have a lot of fruits because alcohol mostly turns into sugar in the body so many cravings you have may just be for sugar. We should also know by now that exercise naturally releases all the feel-good chemicals that small amounts of alcohol release in the brain.

Finally, remind yourself every day of the reasons you quit.

I want everyone to understand that it is very difficult to quit alcohol. After a few days or weeks of quitting, the individual will feel sad and even depressed for some time. Their full range of emotions will come out as there is no alcohol to cover them up anymore. Whatever their reason for drinking will come out in full force. This is unavoidable but can be eased if you see a mental health professional.

If you have relapsed before, that’s okay as most people do. Just view every relapse as the learning opportunity that it is. You are now aware of another trigger and things to avoid. You can start again and now have a higher chance of success.

There is a famous saying during recovery– “One day at a time” as many find it overwhelming to think about the future when it comes to sobriety. Don’t think about being sober for a year. Rather, just think about getting through the day. Once you have done that, you’re ahead of the game. If even this is too overwhelming, just do one hour at a time; one minute even.

Thanking you for reading. Please keep sending any topics you’d like to talk about to caitlinvieira@gmail.com

Say Yes to Life and No to Drugs! Always!

Suicide Prevention Helpline – 223-0001, 223-0009, 623-4444 or 600-7896

Do not be afraid to reach out!

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