If you are raising children you have one of the most important jobs in the world. Although most days seem the same and sometimes your role as a parent/caregiver may become mundane, you must not become complacent. Children are growing and changing every day. They are learning and picking up ideas and habits from their environment and the people around them, so you must stay tuned in to them to keep them on the right track.

When they are small, children are very cute and it is fun to observe their personalities developing. However some adults fall so much in love with the ‘baby’ element of the child that they forget that introducing discipline and (eventually) setting boundaries are just as important, as giving love and protecting their child. Even at the tender age a child can be disciplined.

Discipline does not mean that the child should be slapped, pinched or manhandled in some way for the parent to make his/her point. It means that the child should be spoken to firmly and directly. Not in a jokey or fun manner, not half-heartedl, or while the parent/caregiver is on their cell phone or otherwise distracted.

If you hold a child by his/her hand and you look him/her in the eyes and you tell the child ‘No’ and you mean it, they will know and they will comply. There is a time for everything, but when it comes to disciplining children it needs to be done in a serious manner, you cannot let sentiments get in the way. Even if the child laughs it off and tries to ignore you, you must tell them again and show them that you mean what you say. You must be consistent and firm in your approach when disciplining children from day one.

As your child grows he/she will come to realise that there is an invisible ‘line’ that should not be crossed. The ‘line’ simply distinguishes adult from child and allows the child to know how far he/she can go. The ‘line’ also fosters an understanding in the relationship over time between child and adult. Along with this understanding usually comes trust and respect on both sides.

This does not mean you cannot have a rough and tumble game with your child or play, laugh and enjoy your child, it only means that your child understands that there is a time for play and a time when their parent/caregiver is serious. The child must be able to appreciate the serious side of life as his/her parent caregiver is also his/her protector and has the child’s best interest at heart.

Some parents are afraid to discipline their children because they cannot bear to see their child look or feel sad. Some parents even feel their child might think they do not love them (although disciplining children means quite the opposite), if they ‘put their foot down’ and do not give in to their child’s demands.

There are many scenarios that go on between parent/caregivers and children: e.g. where children have learnt how to ‘work their head’ on the adult to get their own way, or where the adult feels obligated to ‘give in’ to or appease the child for a peace of mind. These types of negative traits can come about when parent/caregivers do not nip unsavoury behaviour in the bud: Or they have not paid attention to, and corrected a child’s negative change in behaviour so it has become ingrained.

We can protect, guide, discipline, respect, love, and set boundaries for our children from day one. This will create a firm foundation and good relationship for their all-round growth and development. We can also flex with them by being versatile and understanding to their growing and ever-changing needs. When you have one of the most important jobs in the world, tips on how to get the best results are never wasted. It is better to introduce positive traits in your child’s life as early as possible: but regardless of how old your child is, if you start today, it will not be too late.

If you are concerned about a child you can ring the CPA hotline 227 0979 or email chilcaregy@gmail.co
A Message from the Childcare and Protection Agency, Ministry of Social Protection